Author: ohsuzan
Date: 2006-10-19 02:05
Dear Jen --
I have read your posts on the Clarinet Board, and I have a great deal of sympathy for your situation. I am a former clarinetist,and I experienced most the same feelings about that instrument that you do.
But at this point, you are at a critical juncture. I know you feel you are just falling apart on the clarinet these days. Pay attention to that -- it may be your "unconscious" way of coming to a decision that you don't want to make consciously. I think you really need to talk to someone you totally trust, and who knows your playing both as an oboist and as a clarinetist. And perhaps you need to talk directly to some of the schools you are considering.
Are you, in fact, playing clarinet at a level that would allow you to auditon competitively at the top-drawer schools you mention? Or are those more like your "reach" schools -- your "dream big" schools? Would you be content to go to a school that would take you as an oboist, even if it were one of your secondary choices, or somewhere that you have not yet considered?
I don't see how you can audition competitively on the oboe at any of the major schools you name. I would be surprised, however, if there weren't some smaller, less prominent, school that would be glad to have you as an oboist. If you found such a place, you could go there for a year, or two, and then transfer elsewhere if that seemed right.
Is there any reason why you could not sit out a year, take oboe lessons, work, look for a good (not necessarily famous) program, and audition as an oboist next year? One year out of academics at this point isn't going to make much difference in your ultimate career outcome, but it could make a huge difference to your mental health.
I sense that you really have yourself tied up in knots over this. I really want to stress again my advice that you get out there and TALK to college admissions folks, conservatory deans, program heads, and private teachers about your situation and see what they might tell you. Call them up. Write them letters. Email them. Visit them. They are the ones who have the answers.
Best of luck to you, Jen -- and you're sure welcome to hang out here, in the meantime.
Susan
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