Author: Lelia Loban ★2017
Date: 2015-06-04 18:20
ClaireAnnette wrote,
>If recipient requests that the behavior cease, it should cease. But, remember, other person may be offended (feel uncomfortable) and not even say something about it at the time.
>
And that's part of the problem. The victim has not only the right but a responsibility to say something and to say it early, when it's still possible to say it in a gentle and collegial manner. That way there may be reasonable hope of coming to an understanding, changing the behavior and getting along well in the future, instead of simply provoking a confrontation. Failing to say anything to the perpetrator, then going behind his or her back to management with an unexpected accusation, is unfair -- and puts management in an awful position.
By this point, the bad behavior may have worsened so much that the victim is *afraid* to say anything to the perpetrator, so management can't really force the victim to go back and deal as he or she should have done in the first place. Once the victim decides things have gone so far that he or she has no choice except to rat out the perpetrator to management, it's too late: confrontation will happen. It will get ugly.
The person who commits the annoying or hostile-seeming behavior may not even be aware that someone's bothered by it (may think the other person enjoys what the perpetrator perceives as harmless humor) until suddenly management says, "Behave or you're fired!" or even, "You're fired!" I think that a person who truly didn't realize he or she has been doing something offensive, then gets hit with a sudden accusation and threat of firing, would react with anger at both management and victim.
From that point, co-workers will take sides. Lawsuit or not, there's no possiblity of a satisfying outcome for anybody involved, including a victim who "wins" when the perpetrator gets fired. From now on, some co-workers will view that victim with fear, anger and suspicion, and will warn new hirees, "Watch out." Welcome to the toxic environment, stage 2.
Lelia
http://www.scoreexchange.com/profiles/Lelia_Loban
To hear the audio, click on the "Scorch Plug-In" box above the score.
Post Edited (2015-06-04 18:20)
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