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 Strangest private lesson?
Author: csmith 
Date:   2008-07-30 19:45

I thought it might be fun to start a thread on a topic a little bit different. What is the strangest thing you have ever experienced during a private lesson? Either as the teacher or as the student? I figure there are a lot of wild stories out there and we could probably have a chuckle at one another's expense by sharing a few of them.

Since I started the thread I'll volunteer to go first. As a performance major in the 80s, I had an "eccentric" college instructor. During my very first lesson with him, I was happily playing the Weber Concertino. After just a couple of minutes into the piece, he left the room. I just kept on playing.

He came back in the room after a couple of minutes........with a gun! Needless to say I was a little startled, but I tried my best to keep playing ("surely I'm not that bad" I thought to myself!). Well, he proceeded to open the front door of the house and shoot a squirrel out of a tree in the front yard! Mind you, we are in the city and I'm sure this wasn't legal, but I digress.

So to top it all off, he stops me and asks what should he do with the dead squirrel. I told him to give it to the cat, and then I finished the Concertino.



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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Claire Annette 
Date:   2008-07-30 20:14

OH MY!!

Well, my high school/college teacher used to grab my horn and play it (mouthpiece and all) during my lessons. Good thing he used cinnamon-y mouthwash beforehand.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: GBK 
Date:   2008-07-30 20:29

After teaching private lessons for more than 30 years there are lots of stories about strange incidents. Many have now become distant memories...

One that I do recall was with a beginning flute student, probably about 9 or 10 years old and taking her 1st flute lesson.

After carefully setting her embouchure and showing how to blow across the tone hole, I asked her to continue to try and get a clear sound while I briefly stepped out of the studio to grab a fresh cup of coffee.

Upon returning a few minutes later there was no sound and no student.

My first reaction was that she ran away...

However, she had gotten dizzy and light headed from all the exhaling, fell off the chair and lay on the floor.

After a few minutes of recovery, she was fine and was laughing about what had happened.

...GBK

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: allencole 
Date:   2008-07-30 20:54

I just started a new flute beginner who had been earnestly practicing the instrument completely backwards for two weeks. (and actually gettingn some results) She had played baritone horn for two years, and wasn't fazed by the way the horn fingered backwards.

Allen Cole

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DAVE 
Date:   2008-07-30 22:43

My weird lessons as a teacher:

1) Occasional mice running around. Totally freaked me out! I cannot handle mice....

2) Once had a girl who would fart when she played loud. The best part is that she never flinched!

3) I have been asked all sorts of inappropriate questions by students about sex and drugs....

4) Had a kid come to a lesson once with a clarinet that his dad repadded. Now that was funny...

As a student there was not much to mention other than one teacher who smoked during the lesson.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: redwine 
Date:   2008-07-30 23:14

Hello CSMITH,

You must have studied with Steve Girko, because he did the same at my first lesson. I must be younger than you, however, because by the time he did it at my lesson, his cat was already trained and pounced on the squirrel at about the same time it hit the ground. I was playing the slow movement of the Mozart Concerto.

Ben Redwine, DMA
owner, RJ Music Group
Assistant Professor, The Catholic University of America
Selmer Paris artist
www.rjmusicgroup.com
www.redwinejazz.com
www.reedwizard.com



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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Ed Palanker 
Date:   2008-07-30 23:49

1-Once a beginner student said he couldn’t get a sound out of his clarinet, I told him the reed needed to be on his bottom lip, not his top teeth.
2- Once a student showed up and opened his case only to say, I left my clarinet home.
3- I had a student come in totally unprepared and when I asked her if she practiced at all this week she said she sits on the top of the stairway in her dorm and plays Amazing Grace for two or three hours a night. I made her drop clarinet as a major by the fourth week.
4- Several times a student showed up without any reeds, once without their mouthpiece.
5- I had a student show up after a few lessons and wondered why he was having trouble fingering the clarinet as I taught him so I reminded him that he should hold the clarinet with the right hand on the thumb rest, not the left.
5- I love this one. Iggy Gennusa one told me when he was taking lessons as a kid, If you knew Iggy it’s hard to imagine him as a kid, he said his teacher fell asleep during his lesson so he played through everything, put a quarter on the music stand, it was a long, long time ago, and went home.
Gee I’m glad I don’t teach beginners anymore. ESP
www.peabody.jhu.edu/457 A little Mozart

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: pewd 
Date:   2008-07-30 23:57

what Dave said - #3 - not so much questions as telling me what they've been doing - unbelieveable what they'll tell you in lessons... i really don't want to hear what you did on your date last night - i don't really need all those details - can we please go back to playing this arpeggio?...


i had a student late for a lesson - at a school, after hours. i went looking for her. i found her in the music library with the lights out with her boyfriend... hard to play a lesson when you're blushing... middle school even.


there was one saxophone student we called cockroach boy. he'd open up his alto case, and guess what would come scurrying out...


i had another student holding his horn too close - i asked him to raise the bell up a bit higher - he fell out of the chair - fell flat on the floor. mind you, he was sitting in the middle of the chair, not on the edge or anything. just stting there, then fell when i asked him to change the horn position a bit. he hit his head on the stand on the way down. clarinet and music and stand all went flying. that was the strangest one i can recall. he apparently had bigger issues than learning to play a clarinet. he'd drop his clarinet at least 2x a week.


i can't recall anything weird when i was a student. maybe my memory's getting fuzzy as i age ;)

- Paul Dods
Dallas, Texas

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: claritoot26 
Date:   2008-07-31 01:35

I had a teenager come to a lesson in her pajamas at 6 pm. It was in the summer and at her house, but still....disrespectful to me and my profession, dontcha think?

My high school teacher dropped her clarinet and broke her vintage Kaspar mouthpiece during my lesson. All because she tucked the clarinet, mouthpiece down, under her arm while she was looking for a book for me on the top shelf, and down it went.

I had two no-shows in a row from one student. How can everybody in the family forget to make sure the child is in the right place at the right time when they're paying over $40 a lesson? Twice!! And, it was at their house!

Lori

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Alseg 
Date:   2008-07-31 01:43

I was in the middle of a lesson with Joseph Gigliotti (Anthony's dad) when suddenly he picked up a baseball bat and bolted from the room.

He returned a few moments later and sat down, shook his head, and muttered "damn neighbor's dog was about to [poo] on the lawn, ok, now let's hear the next etude" I dont think he hit the dog-- just scared it off.


He DID have a meticulous lawn, not one blade of crabgrass, always precisely trimmed, and frequently watered.
He used to hunt pheasant.....glad he didnt keep a rifle nearby.


Former creator of CUSTOM CLARINET TUNING BARRELS by DR. ALLAN SEGAL
-Where the Sound Matters Most(tm)-





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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DavidBlumberg 
Date:   2008-07-31 02:08

"5- I love this one. Iggy Gennusa one told me when he was taking lessons as a kid, If you knew Iggy it’s hard to imagine him as a kid, he said his teacher fell asleep during his lesson so he played through everything, put a quarter on the music stand, it was a long, long time ago, and went home."
----------------------------------------------------


Ed, he must have studied with one of the long time Ballet Players in Phila.

Gigliotti told me a story about a guy who used to do that to many of his students. The students would never wake him up either.


I've got a good one to add, but am tired right now to detail is so will put it in tomorrow.
Was basically the lesson from hell from a 10 yr old spoiled rotten girl who didn't want any part of a lesson (1st private lesson) as it was her 1/2 day of school and was really, really angry that her mom scheduled something that day. What turned into a long screaming match in front of me with her and her mom apparently had happened the day before at the doctors office where for 1 hour she refused to go in.

http://www.SkypeClarinetLessons.com


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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: allencole 
Date:   2008-07-31 02:14

I had an in-school position a few years ago where I gave lessons in the instrument room. One student would always come in with her horn, and promptly go in someone else's case to 'borrow' a tuning barrel.

Her own barrel was broken in half (not split, but two mini-barrels), and even had the donut-shaped scar as if it were a broken-off stalgmite. How this happened was never explained to my satisfaction, but I'm still awed by the strength and leverage that must've been involved in such an 'accident.' Although she took clarinet lessons, she always played marimba or low brass in the band, and to my knowledge never replaced that barrel.

At one point, I even talked to the band director about dropping her from the lesson schedule, but he responded that she was one of his best players.

Allen Cole

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: csmith 
Date:   2008-07-31 03:20

Hi Ben,

Did you attend SMU? You're right! I studied with Girko. How funny he did the same thing to you! I have often told that story at after-concert parties, always to everyone's amazement, and amusement. Too funny there are others out there that have the same story!

I can tell one more I remember vividly. I was playing Weber again - maybe it's just something with him and Weber? - and while I was playing he punched me in the stomach. And I don't mean a friendly reminder tap either. I'm sure you know what I mean. Well, I got the message and I have kept my stomach muscles tight when playing clarinet ever since that day!

Oh and I just remembered one as a teacher. During one studen't first lesson I asked my student to take off her reed because the sound obviously indicated she hadn't soaked her reed. You know how kids sometimes just leave the reed on the mouthpiece after practicing? Well, on the back of her reed was fuzz! Yep, she actually had fungus growing on her reed because she hadn't taken it off the mouthpiece for so long. She nearly threw up - and me too! She never left the reed on the mouthpiece again after that!

Chad Smith

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: SVSorna05 
Date:   2008-07-31 04:03

Ben, csmith....The gun is still on the dining room table as of last week...
-Dain-

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: donald 
Date:   2008-07-31 06:39

i once took the reed of a students mouthpiece, his name was "Woody" something, and the blue fungus/slime in the mouthpiece made me retch... I actually had to run from the room... and did in fact puke a little (luckily i always carry toothpaste and brush etc with me, so the rest of that days students didn't have to smell puke). Lets make this clear, i was NOT hung over.
dn

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: redwine 
Date:   2008-07-31 10:44

Hello,

I did not attend SMU, but would drive down from Norman, Oklahoma once a month to take lessons. The experience was phenomenal, as each lesson entailed roughly 3 or 4 hours playing, a meal or two prepared by Steve, a free concert at the Dallas Symphony, an overnight stay in his guest room, and another lesson in the morning before the drive home. Now I can't remember if I paid $90 or $100 for each "lesson". Steve was the best! I still miss my lessons with him!

Another good Girko story: At one of my lessons, he had the Corigliano Concerto score and parts on his hearth. When I saw them, I asked, "oh, are you going to play that?" He said, "F%&# YOU!".

I saw him last summer and think he's mellowed out a bit, which is a shame, but I think he could have, and still can, I'm sure, play the Corigliano without much practice!

Ben Redwine, DMA
owner, RJ Music Group
Assistant Professor, The Catholic University of America
Selmer Paris artist
www.rjmusicgroup.com
www.redwinejazz.com
www.reedwizard.com



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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: csmith 
Date:   2008-07-31 12:52

Ben,

I cracked up when I read Steve's response to your question about the Corigliano! It's so true! I remember once on the way to his house for a lesson I was listening to WRR and there was some Bartok piece playing. When I got to his house he was listening to WRR as well so I said something along the lines of "That's Bartok". Mind you, I was a naive freshman and was expecting to hear something encouraging or uplifting like "Good job, you're right!" Of course I should have known better. His reponse, "No sh**!"

Sounds like you had a really cool experience studying with him. You're right, I'll bet he could play the Corigliano without much practice. Probably the Hillandale Waltzes too!

Chad

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: KristinVanHorn 
Date:   2008-07-31 13:21

csmith wrote:

> Ben,
>
> I cracked up when I read Steve's response to your question
> about the Corigliano! It's so true! I remember once on the way
> to his house for a lesson I was listening to WRR and there was
> some Bartok piece playing. When I got to his house he was
> listening to WRR as well so I said something along the lines of
> "That's Bartok". Mind you, I was a naive freshman and was
> expecting to hear something encouraging or uplifting like "Good
> job, you're right!" Of course I should have known better. His
> reponse, "No sh**!"
>
> Sounds like you had a really cool experience studying with him.
> You're right, I'll bet he could play the Corigliano without
> much practice. Probably the Hillandale Waltzes too!
>
> Chad

That man sounds like a nut. I would have been gone as soon as he brought out the guns.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Brenda 2017
Date:   2008-07-31 13:58

Nothing as strange as these...

In view of the current concern with conduct between teacher and student I used to encourage the parent to stay with us in the studio. This lasted until the day that my student got so frustrated with Mom repeating the instructions I'd given her that she threw her clarinet down and ran up the stairs. Fortunately I've had teenagers of my own so this behaviour wasn't too bizarre to figure out. We gave her a few minutes alone and then Mom went to look for her. After that I prepared an area just outside the studio where Mom or Dad could sit and read but still hear everything, giving the student some time relatively alone but without the added parental comments.

As someone else mentioned above, I was startled when Abe Galper took my clarinet and played it without switching mouthpieces. I figured at his age he had more to lose than I did. To set the record straight this was more than a year before he died, so it wasn't me!

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DavidBlumberg 
Date:   2008-07-31 14:44

Some teachers are pretty bold about trying equipment without an alcohol swab, etc to at least help with the germs.

I'm sure that there are still some, many? out there who play students equipment and don't think about it except maybe ask the student if they are sick. I know of a few who do that.

Nasty!!!!!

http://www.SkypeClarinetLessons.com


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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: TonkaToy 
Date:   2008-07-31 14:49

This may not delve into the realm of strangeness but, at the time, it certainly struck me as different, perhaps even odd, definitely disconcerting.

In my first lesson with George Silfies I played the Nielsen for him. I knew that George played the piano but I didn't yet realize that he was...a pianist. I started playing and he sat down without a score and accompanied me flawlessly, at the same time saying things like, "watch the A flat here, you have to be a little high because you're playing in unison with the 2nd violins". That was disorienting enough, but when we came to the first cadenza he grabbed two pencils off the top of the piano and started playing the snare drum part. I realized immediately that this was going to be a long, strange trip.

Also, George's studio was directly across the hall from Joe Kalichstein's, the pianist. I would be in a lesson or our studio would be having a master class and George would hear one of Mr. Kalichstein's students having a lesson and would walk over to the piano, sit down, and start playing along with the student. That led to some nasty looks in the hall after class.

The all-time weirdest lesson I had was from a well know clarinetist who shall remain nameless. I had auditioned for a summer festival with another clarinetist who backed out at the last moment. When I originally auditioned I was told that I would be playing 2nd to the instructor in the faculty orchestra that summer. The day before rehearsals started I went to play for the new clarinetist. I played about 10 notes, he stopped me, and went off. "You suck. You can't play worth a ****. What in the **** are you doing here wasting my **** time". I stopped, put my horn away, and left. The next day when rehearsals started I was last chair in the Jr. High band and that's where I spent the next six weeks. What a summer.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: ASBassCl1 
Date:   2008-07-31 14:58

Well one of my first few lessons on clarinet my teacher and I sat at the mirror sticking our tongues out trying to get the right shape, arch, etc. It was pretty awkward for an hour lesson!

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Katrina 
Date:   2008-07-31 15:01

Not my story, but my violinist friend's:

While teaching a 6 or 7 year old girl, my friend was explaining a point and suddenly the girl put her hand behind her back. She brought he hand around to the front and said "I peed." My friend was speechless, but sent the girl to the bathroom.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: GBK 
Date:   2008-07-31 15:50

In the public schools I once had a beginning trumpet player come in for his weekly lesson, but was reluctant to take out his instrument because he said it was broken

When I asked him what had happened he said it had "fallen off the table".

Upon opening the case, I saw the trumpet was squashed flat as a dinner plate.

Finally, the student admitted that he was sent outside to practice, so he decided to practice in the driveway. After a short time he finished but forgot his trumpet, and his mom had backed over it with the car.

To this day I still don't know if his mom did it intentionally. [wink]

...GBK

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Francis 
Date:   2008-07-31 18:10

Back in the mid 60's, I studied with Robert Anderson who had been at Teal School of Music in Detroit and later at his home. He had leukemia and toward the end of his life had to cancel several lessons because of trips to the hospital for transfusions. But he owned 2 Jaguar XKE's and one evening after my lesson he offered to give me a ride. We went out to I-96 and soon were flying along at well over 100mph. Back then traffic was pretty light at night so I never sensed any real danger, but then I was an invincible 20 something.
That was my strangest private lesson!
Francis Rizner



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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Brenda Siewert 
Date:   2008-07-31 19:08

I'll not name my teacher because many of you may know him and I don't want to embarass him. But, the first time I went to a private lesson I was an adult player already in an orchestra position. I was wanting to learn from him because he is a wonderful player and a mutual friend suggested it while the prof. was present in the room with us and I felt obligated to try it.
The lesson was ok, not great. He had his son with him (a little tot at the time) and the child was adorable, but a bit of a distraction to him (and to me). Anyway, we went through a few scales and an exercise and he stopped and wanted to talk. I thought, "Great, he's going to give me pointers."

Well, he gave me a few pointers, but he wanted to talk about how he wanted to start a business hand-making mouthpieces and wondered if I wanted to invest in that. I was thinking, "Is he asking for a donation, or what?" Then he started talking about how he would need to go to Paris for a few months, possibly a year, and study. So, he needed money to live on and travel expenses. I'm thinking, "Is this guy nuts? Does he think I'm rich, or is he just having a conversation?"

I told him I didn't have any extra money, especially after paying the enormous fee through the university for his private class. It was very awkward. He didn't bring it up again after that. It certainly damaged the respect I had for him. But, I gave him the benefit of the doubt and took a few more lessons and then quit. It was too hard to deal with the child in the room and the unmentioned money thing. UGH.



Post Edited (2008-07-31 19:09)

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Lynn 
Date:   2008-08-01 01:13

"That man sounds like a nut. I would have been gone as soon as he brought out the guns."

Kristin,

You may have been gone as soon as he brought out the guns but I can assure you that you would have missed the clarinet lesson of your life. Until you can play as well as Steve does please don't call him a nut. Perhaps you should make your way to San Antonio and schedule a lesson with him.

For what it's worth......the guns are BB guns.......air pistols. He's really a big 'wusss' that plays clarinet extremely well. He simply does not like squirrels......... never has.......never will. I regard him as one of my best friends, my mentor, my teacher, and above all.....a very sweet guy who has dealt with life's little quirks better than most people I know.

Lynn

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: renee 
Date:   2008-08-01 23:27

Oh Girko!
He still has that gun!

In responce to the "no ****", I won an audition, and he responded with "you want a cookie?"

When I started with Girko my rythem was just god awful. I remember him being upset and I little hard on me. Every lesson was like a beating, but yet I could not wait until Sunday morning! I don't remember this lesson, but appearntly he got so mad at me (yelling and screaming) that he felt bad! He even thought that I would call the cops on him and never come back.

The next Sunday when I came back he felt really bad. I'm used to being screamed at, my family is very disfunctional, so I guess that the previous lesson had no real effect. I don't even remember him getting upset with me, but to this day he still feels bad!

Girko was such an awsome teacher! He's not "a nut" kristen he's very passionate and he want's his students to be the best players that they can be.



Post Edited (2008-08-01 23:54)

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Claire Annette 
Date:   2008-08-02 00:24

OK, I now have a story to add from a lesson I taught yesterday.

I have a 7th grader who is still pretty much a beginner. Yesterday, we were working hard on tone, embouchure, high notes, and air support.

The poor girl nearly passed out, no kidding! We had a stand up lesson and she had to sit on the floor because she was so light-headed. Next lesson with her, it's back to chairs.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: feadog79 
Date:   2008-08-02 01:14

Had a student belch intermittently throughout an entire lesson. She acted as though it were perfectly routine, normal behavior.

JW

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: redwine 
Date:   2008-08-02 12:33

Hello,

I am pretty sure that I'm one of Steve Girko's biggest fans. When I studied clarinet from him, I didn't just learn clarinet, I learned about life. And, if life isn't a bit nutty, I'd say it's not worth living. I would probably call Steve a bit nutty, but nutty in a great way. I don't think he'd object to someone calling him that either, but I could be wrong. I wish I lived near him now. I do miss hanging out with him!

Ben Redwine, DMA
owner, RJ Music Group
Assistant Professor, The Catholic University of America
Selmer Paris artist
www.rjmusicgroup.com
www.redwinejazz.com
www.reedwizard.com



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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Lelia Loban 2017
Date:   2008-08-02 19:36

I never had a teacher bag varmints during a lesson, but when I was in junior high and high school, in the late 1950s through mid-1960s, something strange happened with my private piano teacher, not once, but over and over: If my playing disappointed him, he'd begin quietly weeping. (Implication: "Oh, how can you do this to me?!") I'd practice my brains out to avoid the embarrassment of that scene.

One day, after a particularly sad meltdown at the previous lesson, he contrived to explain something to me without saying a word. I already knew he was Jewish; I'd noticed his German-sounding accent; and I'd noticed that he maintained a larger space around himself than most North Americans do and that he backed away quickly with an expression of suppressed panic when people came too near. Other than that, I knew little about him except as related to his music, though I'd also noticed that he and his wife kept their house immaculately clean, that he always dressed meticulously and that his well-pressed shirt was invariably long-sleeved, even in summer.

That day (a week after he'd spent much of a lesson in tears), I noticed when I arrived that he'd left one sleeve unbuttoned. I wouldn't notice such a thing on most men, but on him, it looked uncharacteristically sloppy. Normally, when I played, he sat in a chair behind me, well back from the piano, where I couldn't see him. That day, as I played, he walked up and turned the page for me, something he'd never done before.

He leaned in and reached forward, early, slowly, holding that arm out, moving it in such a way that the unbuttoned sleeve fell back toward his elbow. As he lingered with his fingers on the bent corner of the page, I couldn't help seeing his bare wrist in front of my face. On his skin I saw a dull blue tattoo. Then he flipped the page, snapped his hand away and silently disappeared to his chair behind me. Took me a minute, but by the time I finished playing I'd realized what those crude numerals must be: his concentration camp number. He was telling me why his nerves were shot to hell.

When I finished playing the piece and turned around for his verdict, I saw he'd buttoned up his sleeve. The question I nearly asked must have shown on my face, because he shook his head, a tiny, sharp movement, once to the side and back. I stifled the question. Neither of us ever spoke of what he'd shown me.

During the summer after I turned 18, when I told him I had to quit because I'd graduated and would be attending school too far away to come back for lessons, he asked me if I were going to a private high school--and I realized he'd somehow gotten confused about my age. He thought I was graduating from junior high (at age 13 or 14). Okay, I was small for my age, but sheesh! When I explained the facts as gently as possible, he started not just weeping but really bawling.

I was probably one of his stupidest students. I hate to think of what he suffered with the talented ones!

Lelia
http://www.scoreexchange.com/profiles/Lelia_Loban
To hear the audio, click on the "Scorch Plug-In" box above the score.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Katrina 
Date:   2008-08-02 22:42

One of my childhood piano instructors always ate dinner during lessons. My sisters and I took a block of about an hour & a half in a row, and depending on which of us went at which time, we'd be subjected to his noshing sounds. One time he offered me a bite of his mashed sweet potatoes. He was creepy anyways, so I of course refused, but since I was about 13, I was "totally grossed out to the max."

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Michael E. Shultz 
Date:   2008-08-02 23:00

My private lessons were rather tame compared to these. I do remember my clarinet and saxophone teacher would shout NO! NO! NO! when he did not like how I played. This teacher was responsible for my learning to play the low clarinets. He suggested to my band director that I would be more useful as a clarinet player during concert season. I played bass clarinet one season, then when the contralto player graduated, I played contralto the last 2 years of high school. I learned to play contralto parts or transpose bass clarinet parts on sight equally well. I eventually reached the stage on my saxophone playing when he told me it was time to move up to another teacher (he was primarily a clarinet teacher).

It was common to switch instruments between players back then. My band director, who was a pipe smoker, always left an unpleasant taste on my reeds. Once, before a concert, the band director asked if a middle school player could use my Couf alto saxophone and Gale 5M mouthpiece because her horn had some sort of mechanical failure. I said yes, and got it back undamaged. I wondered what she thought of my horn, though. It was probably in a whole other league from what she was used to playing. I always kept my instruments in perfect mechanical condition, too.

We did have a middle school clarinet player die from bacterial meningitis. There was some concern other whether instruments had been swapped around, thus exposing others to possible infection.

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
Groucho Marx

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DavidBlumberg 
Date:   2008-08-02 23:24

I got done with a Piano lesson (was 12) and left the teachers home, got on my bike and went about 1 block when a funnel cloud hit. One of those quick storms where the sky turned a really creppy dark color, winds got up to 95 mph - was powerful enough to literally throw my bike 10 ft when I got off of it. Trash cans were flying everywhere, was quite a scene.


I ran back to the teacher's house and banged on the door, but got no response. Finally after it calmed down a lot she heard my banging and came to the door.

THAT was scary.....


No cell phones back in 1975,,,,,,,,

http://www.SkypeClarinetLessons.com


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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DavidBlumberg 
Date:   2008-08-03 00:06

This one a former student's mom told me:

When she was 10 a piano teacher would come to her home to give her lessons. One day after a lesson her mom had mentioned to the teacher that they were going to walk to the shopping center a couple of blocks away. The teacher offered to give them a ride to it and she took him up on that.

They came home a few hours later to find the Piano teacher DEAD ON THE KITCHEN FLOOR with their TV next to him and a few other things from the house. Apparently the guy came back to their home and was robbing them when he had a fatal heart attack from the excitement.


The guy's wife was mortified!!!


You know good and darned well that it really can't get any stranger than that.....

http://www.SkypeClarinetLessons.com


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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: GBK 
Date:   2008-08-03 02:37

DavidBlumberg wrote:

> got on my bike and went about 1 block when a funnel cloud hit.
> One of those quick storms where the sky turned a really
> creppy dark color, winds got up to 95 mph -
> was powerful enough to literally throw my bike 10 ft
> when I got off of it. Trash cans were flying everywhere,
> was quite a scene.


...and when Toto and I landed we realized we weren't in Kansas anymore.

...GBK

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: renee 
Date:   2008-08-03 15:40

ok. this is not a lesson, but..
at my first piano recital the girl who played before me wet her pants.



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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Philip Caron 
Date:   2008-08-03 18:13

Well, this was not a private lesson, but learning definetly occurred. Years ago our community band was playing outdoors on the green in Hancock, NH. It was a beautiful day, and there were a lot of people of all ages sitting in chairs or on the grass, along with a couple dogs. I was sitting priciple first.

During one piece there was an extended rest for the section, and per decorum we had our instruments in our laps. With a few bars of rest left to go, one of the dogs came happily gamboling across in front of the band, turned slightly in behind the conductor, gave my reed in passing a big sloppy lap, and continued on his way. Then it was time to play.

The rest of the first clarinets just cracked up and missed their entrance. The entire flute section cracked up, unisono. The audience cracked up. The conductor, nonplussed and unaware, almost lost the beat. But I came in as directed, steady and true.

Considering the limited canine repertoire, it could have been worse. Watch out for roaming dogs.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DavidBlumberg 
Date:   2008-08-03 18:36

GBK  :)

I was probably too heavy to blow away.......

http://www.SkypeClarinetLessons.com


Post Edited (2009-02-06 11:37)

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Lelia Loban 2017
Date:   2008-08-04 12:17

>>The guy's wife was mortified!!!>>

Groucho, wagging eyebrows and gesturing with cigar:
"Not nearly as mortified as the piano teacher."

Okay, okay, somebody had to say it.

Lelia
http://www.scoreexchange.com/profiles/Lelia_Loban
To hear the audio, click on the "Scorch Plug-In" box above the score.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Anon 
Date:   2008-08-04 12:24

As a student, I had a teacher whip off his shoes and socks to cut his toenails during a lessons. I was horrified.

As a teacher, I had a student who had taken 3 or 4 clarinet lessons (brand new beginner - not really catching on too quickly) but showed up the last time I saw her with an OBOE and said "I want you to teach me this thing instead"

I gave her an oboist's phone number and sent her on her way!

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Nasubi77 
Date:   2008-08-06 19:26

This is the funniest thread....

I was a college student helping out my HS band director at their band camp by heading up the clarinet sectionals. I took one student's reed off to re-position it and found a moldy science experiment growing on the backside!

I think all clarinet (or really any instrument) teachers are a tad touched in general. My college prof was a pretty good wacko although I can't come up with any specific experience to back that up...

The lady who taught my Flute/Oboe/Bassoon methods class liked to use the word "poo" to get us to form the correct embouchure for flute....so anytime we started playing we would hear..

"Backs straight, heads up, feet flat on the floor, and...poooo."

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: MichaelR 
Date:   2008-08-06 20:53

Perhaps you should make your way to San Antonio and schedule a lesson with him. For what it's worth......the guns are BB guns.......air pistols.

It's good to know I still have a chance to get a lesson with him - if I get good enough before he quits teaching.

But you didn't need to reveal that it was a air gun. I had wonderful visions of a 22 or a 32...

--
Michael of Portland, OR
Be Appropriate and Follow Your Curiosity

Post Edited (2008-08-06 21:05)

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: elk 
Date:   2009-02-06 04:08

In response to the Steve Girko stories,
I'm a 10th grader and I have had the fortune to play side by side with Mr. Girko in the Austin Symphony. To be honost I'd heard "horror" stories about him being a tough teacher and was scared to death of him the first night I had rehearsal with the ASO. After meeting him I asked if I could have a lesson with him over the TMEA etudes for all-state. During the lesson he was commenting on the breath marks edited in,
"The original didn't have all this bullsh*t!"
He went onto talking about instruments that he hated
"I hate trombones with their d@mn slides! They're never in tune!"
If this is the melo Mr. Girko I wish I could have met him when he still had his "gun"...I'll be sure to mention that to him the next time I have a lesson with him! Does anyone have anymore insteresting stories about him, I laugh so hard to the point of tears at his sarcasm!



Post Edited (2009-02-07 03:08)

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: elk 
Date:   2009-02-06 04:31

Another story of Mr. Girko,
After area auditions I was one chair away from making state and Mr. Girko simply told me,
"Well the judges can just shove it up their a$$!"
I wasn't quite as sad after hearing him say that though!

Beside having lessons with Mr. Girko, I've actually asked my Geometry teacher who almost became a professional clarinetist for a "mini" lesson after getting help on my homework! He was actaully able to give me some great feeback and advice too! I've also played my clarinet for my biology teacher who was once in band and he also gave me great advice, needless to say we had a whole discussion about applying biology to music...especially about the tongue muscle!



Post Edited (2009-02-06 05:30)

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: JessKateDD 
Date:   2009-02-06 06:18

Well, that was a pretty big bump, but I never participated in this thread before, so here goes:

The first year I was teaching, I had a student, about 16, who missed a lot of lessons. She'd come to me right after school, hand me my check, and tell me she couldn't make her lesson that day but her parents wanted to pay me anyway. After a couple of months, I called the mom, thanking her for paying me every week, but telling her I'd really like to earn my money instead of being paid for missed lessons. Her mom's response was "What are you talking about? She goes to every lesson!"

That summer, I heard that the student had dropped out of high school and had a baby.

Elk, sorry about your missing state by one. That's tough. Maybe you should borrow Steve's gun and visit one of the players who beat you. I had 4 students make state this year, but don't bother coming to my place, since Austin isn't in our area.

Like Steve, I hate the Hite version of the Rose etudes. Terrible book - overedited, stupid breath marks, and metronome markings so slow that I just want to gag. I just flipped open that foul book - here's page 6, Andante, which Hite says is quarter = 56. The next page - Moderato, half = 63. Two pages later - Moderato, quarter = 60. Pure silliness! Choosing three slow and easy etudes, giving students 5 1/2 months to practice them, then making that the sole measure of earning all-state, is truly ridiculous, but that's where we are right now.

To those of you who think toting a gun around is strange behavior - well, this is Texas, after all!

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: 3dogmom 
Date:   2009-02-06 11:23

What a great thread.

Hands down - the time I was asked my bra size.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Lelia Loban 2017
Date:   2009-02-06 13:35

>>Hands down - the time I was asked my bra size.
>>

Yipes! Yeah, that story rates waaaaaayyyy up there on the Weird-O-Meter and leaves dirty-minded me wondering what in the world a teacher might use as an excuse to ask such a thing?

Lelia
http://www.scoreexchange.com/profiles/Lelia_Loban
To hear the audio, click on the "Scorch Plug-In" box above the score.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: MichaelR 
Date:   2009-02-06 14:03

Yipes! Yeah, that story rates waaaaaayyyy up there on the Weird-O-Meter and leaves dirty-minded me wondering what in the world a teacher might use as an excuse to ask such a thing?

Hmmm, I thought it was the student asking the teacher.

--
Michael of Portland, OR
Be Appropriate and Follow Your Curiosity

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: clarinetguy 2017
Date:   2009-02-07 02:23

Here's a story about the legendary Keith Stein, a real gentleman in every way, one of the kindest men who ever lived. He was truly one of a kind, and I feel quite fortunate that I had an opportunity to study with him. He was always positive, and I never saw him get angry. I didn't hear him play very often; by the time I studied with him, his arthritis was bothering him and it was difficult for him to play. Stein really knew how to get to the heart of a piece, and his little suggestions always made sense. After a lesson with him, you really felt like you were playing better.

A lot of instructors approach etudes with a businesslike approach; play it and play it right, don't get emotionally attached to it, and move on. Not Stein! I remember going through the Rose etudes with him, and he approached them as important pieces of music, not studies. Once I was playing one of these etudes (I don't remember which one), and Stein was listening to me from across the room. He was smiling, and he really seemed to be enjoying the music. Then, he started to dance! He was really trying to move with the music, or perhaps it was his way of passing along his wisdom to me--I'll never know. I found it hard to keep a straight face, and I started to laugh. He wasn't sure why I was laughing, but before I knew it, he was laughing too. It was one of those great moments that I'll always remember. Although I'm not on the same level that Stein was as a player, I really try to emulate his teaching style (though without the dancing!).

My second story isn't as pleasant. I later studied with the solo clarinet player of a major symphony orchestra who shall go nameless. He was an amazing clarinetist, but his personality left a lot to be desired. Lessons with him were always a tense experience, and you never knew when his ugly temper and sarcasm would flare. During my second lesson with him, he asked me what kind of reed and mouthpiece I was using, but I don't remember why. I told him and his ugly response was something like, "If the g**dam mouthpiece and reed combination don't work, get one that does!" No constructive advice or suggestions, just this. There is absolutely no excuse for this kind of behavior.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Lelia Loban 2017
Date:   2009-02-07 14:23

>>Lessons with him were always a tense experience, and you never knew when his ugly temper and sarcasm would flare. >>

Though I've never had a music teacher of that ilk, several of my high school and college English teachers behaved that way. Oddly enough, I got along quite well with those people, and the way I did it was by giving the crap right back in equally blunt language. This bullying type of teacher often responds surprisingly well to a crude refusal to be bullied.

I'm curious how you dealt with this situation:
>>During my second lesson with him, he asked me what kind of reed and mouthpiece I was using, but I don't remember why. I told him and his ugly response was something like, "If the g**dam mouthpiece and reed combination don't work, get one that does!" No constructive advice or suggestions, just this. There is absolutely no excuse for this kind of behavior.
>>

I agree and I wouldn't have put up with it. My response would've been, in a loud voice while facing him, grinning like a maniac, mixing laughter with the words and looking him right in the eye, "That's a ****ing unconstructive ****ing response that doesn't help me one ****ing bit! What the **** do you mean by 'one that does'? Any specific suggestions for 'one that does' or are you just a foulmouthed ***ing bully or what the ****?"

The maniacal grin and the laughter, showing you're not even seriously upset, much less intimidated (he hasn't succeeded in controlling you), are the keys to throwing abuse back like a boomerang and turning the encounter from a diatribe into a dialogue.

I had a similar encounter, minus the cussing, with the legendary or infamous (take your pick) Dr. Stanley Fish, my upper division Milton professor at U. C. Berserkeley in 1968 or 1969. He didn't cuss in class, but he could be incredibly blunt and challenging. What he really wanted to do, I think, was wake us up, sort of the way Jim Morrison of The Doors used to do when he'd take an aggressive stance at the front of the stage and scream, "Do any of you people even know you're alive?!!" There are better ways to accomplish waking up a lecture hall of 400 or so college students than by jutting out one's chin and shouting, "None of you morons know how to think!" but there's no doubt it worked.

The first time I raised my hand in class and Prof. Fish gave me the business, I raised my voice right back at him and when he tried to shout me down, I stood up, leaned forward aggressively and shouted louder. We stood there bellowing at each other for a good five minutes. We ended up getting along fine. At the end of the term, I got an A out of him, too.

Lelia
http://www.scoreexchange.com/profiles/Lelia_Loban
To hear the audio, click on the "Scorch Plug-In" box above the score.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DavidBlumberg 
Date:   2009-02-07 14:40

Maybe you should have said with a straight face " well, can I have yours??"

http://www.SkypeClarinetLessons.com


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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: clarinetguy 2017
Date:   2009-02-07 15:27

>My second story isn't as pleasant. I later studied with the solo clarinet player of a major symphony orchestra who shall go nameless. He was an amazing clarinetist, but his personality left a lot to be desired. Lessons with him were always a tense experience, and you never knew when his ugly temper and sarcasm would flare. During my second lesson with him, he asked me what kind of reed and mouthpiece I was using, but I don't remember why. I told him and his ugly response was something like, "If the g**dam mouthpiece and reed combination don't work, get one that does!" No constructive advice or suggestions, just this. There is absolutely no excuse for this kind of behavior.

Perhaps I should have added the rest of this story. I was working part time on a masters degree (music ed) at the time. A few weeks later, this "gem" of a man decided that he didn't have time to teach me anymore. He sent me to another instructor who was also a member of the orchestra's clarinet section. This is one of the best things that ever happened to me. He was a very kind man, and I learned a lot from him.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: 3dogmom 
Date:   2009-02-07 16:09

No, the bra size thing was the teacher asking the student. Times were different back then, folks, sexual harassment wasn't even heard of then.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: DavidBlumberg 
Date:   2009-02-07 17:04


But creepy behavior was never acceptable.
Your dad should have punched his lights out.

http://www.SkypeClarinetLessons.com


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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Brian Peterson 
Date:   2009-02-07 22:15

Hey elk,et. al.

I've been working with Steve Girko just this week. I'm pleased to report that his "wit" has been keeping me in stitches and made performing a less than exciting piece of music quite enjoyable. He hasn't lost his touch.

Brian

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: elk 
Date:   2009-02-08 17:46

"Maybe you should borrow Steve's gun and visit one of the players who beat you"
And ask if they'd like to go shoot squirrels with me? Chairs 1-9 were all wonderful musicians and besides, I've got two more years to make it! And I do agree, its not too uncommon to find out that people have their own guns...and choose to take care of vermin on their own instead of calling an exterminator!
I've had to deal with teachers, especially my middle school band director who was a clarinetist himself, who didn't have the greatest sense of sarcasm. Well I gave them the same crap they gave me, if they made some rude sarcastic remark I just said the same thing back! But sometimes two people just can't work together, my first private lesson teacher was just a down right brude person and after two weeks of taking lessons I quite and moved onto another teacher.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: clarinetguy 2017
Date:   2009-02-08 20:45

I just remembered another story.

I was playing a transcription of a Bach cello piece for another instructor (not of of the instructors mentioned above). There's a lot of debate about performing Bach--crescendos or no crescendos, ritards (and if so, how much) etc. I was playing it very "straight," but my teacher wanted me to add a lot of romantic touches. I politely questioned him about this, and his answer was one I will always remember. "If Bach had known that the Romantic Period was right around the corner, he'd have wanted his music played this way," he said. Ok! I didn't discuss it any more, but I know that some Bach scholars reading this will cringe.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: Marie from New York 
Date:   2009-02-09 18:47

I had a young boy show up quite late for his lesson. When I mentioned the time, he shrugged and said, "I don't know...I guess I had to take an extra long dump!"

My father taught for years with all seven of us kids underfoot. (well, outside the studio) Once my sister ran in with a pair of his underpants over her head and once I ran in naked because the tub was overflowing and I panicked.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: johnniegoldfish 
Date:   2009-02-11 17:59

This was a private guitar lesson around 1969. The teacher was a bearded male with very long, curly hair and he taught out of his home. When I arrived he had giant beer cans in his hair and said his girlfriend was straightening his hair for a gig that night. The following week his hair was the usual normal curly. I had to ask and he said it just was real poofy and he had to wet it down.

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 Re: Strangest private lesson?
Author: George Stalle 
Date:   2009-02-13 01:52

Pleasant lesson memories: Russ Dagon, ex-principal of Milwauke and prof. at Northwestern (now retired) may remember the 2 or 3 times I had to hitchhike from my house in Oconomowoc, WI, to his house in Waukesha for my lesson. I always managed to stop at MacDonald's on the way. That was the early 70s.

Fast forward to the fall of 1974 in London when I took some lessons with Gervase DePeyer and the lessons would stretch for 2-3 hours. His wife at the time would bring us up a tray of tea, scones and cookies, then we'd go back to shaving reeds and talking music.

Sorry, I don't have any gun or bra stories, though I've had a few students I'd like to shoot.

George Stalle

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