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 Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Mike 
Date:   2002-03-11 20:58

i want to know if anyone has had the same problem i have been having, recently i have become sexually frustrated and have been feeling some romance for my clarinet, i have corresed it but i feel extremely awkard now, does anyone else every have feelings towards there musical instruments? i need some advice in my life at the moment, whenever i hear that orgasmic sound from my clarinet it just gets me going. does anyone have any advice for me? what should i do now this happens?

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: diz 
Date:   2002-03-11 21:07

Mike - I seem to remember you being warned about putting offensive remarks on this BB - whilst this is just stupid, not offensive - why not remember that a lot of the readers here are youngsters and your remark is thoroughly inappropraite.

Sheesh - hope Mark kills this one

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Mark Charette 
Date:   2002-03-11 21:59

Mike, I can imagine you're frustrated, since anyone with any maturity at all would be put off by your puerile comments.

Perhaps you can find some other BBoard more to your liking? Like those inhabited by a much younger crowd, say, 8 or 9 years olds?

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Wendy 
Date:   2002-03-11 22:04

Mark-
That's the LAST place you should be sending this guy - to a BB inhabited by children. Just get rid of him.
Wendy

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: GBK 
Date:   2002-03-11 22:11

Mike... 1-800-GROW-UP

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Joe O'Kelly 
Date:   2002-03-11 22:11

You've been watching too much "American Pie".

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: chuck 
Date:   2002-03-11 22:12

The advice you need is not to be found here, and propriety prevents me from suggesting several "home remedies" that you might pursue. As a start, you might discontinue your internet provider. Chuck

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: diz 
Date:   2002-03-11 22:14

Wendy - I tend to agree with you - although - I'm sure there's plenty of BBs out there inhabited my moronic 8 year olds - I'm sure mark would feel quite at home there.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Larry Liberson 
Date:   2002-03-11 23:01

C'mon, Mark (and everyone else)--Obviously the poor boy has a legitimate problem that must be attended to...so instead of castigating him, we should try to help him to put an end to his frustration.

Perhaps by instructing him where he can stick his clarinet?

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: diz 
Date:   2002-03-11 23:21

LOL @ Larry - ouch - that bit hard

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: David Pegel 
Date:   2002-03-11 23:23

Gross! And I'm even in high school!!

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Mark Charette 
Date:   2002-03-11 23:38

Oh, I'm not sure I'd feel at home there ... 8^) (boy, I hope that was a slip you made in spelling ..)

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Mark Charette 
Date:   2002-03-11 23:39

Yeah, but shouldn't a clarinet see the light of day once in a while?

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Sally Gardens 
Date:   2002-03-11 23:42

Mikey, thanks for the heads-up. Now we know who NOT to buy a clarinet from.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Jane 
Date:   2002-03-12 01:23

Why the heck is everyone being so cruel and immature? Maybe this is a legitimate problem. Who knows, and we shouldn't be insulting people we know nothing about. While I totally agree that this post is completely inappropriate to be posted here, wouldn't it be a lot better just to delete the post, know the person who posted learned a lesson, and only make a big deal out of it if it happens again, or, if he already has done something offensive, at least not make posts as bad if not worse than the one he originally made? Keep in maind, as many of you have pointed out, younger people are on this board, and if there is just one inappropriate post they may be offended by it, but a whole string would draw more attention than just one.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: JMcAulay 
Date:   2002-03-12 03:24

How old is your Clarinet?

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: diz 
Date:   2002-03-12 03:35

This entire thread leaves a funny taste in the mouth.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Sneakers 
Date:   2002-03-12 04:22

I disagree that Mike's post is just stupid, I find it very offensive, and since he has posted offensive things before, it appears he hasn't learned his lesson. Perhpas he has no idea what is offensive to other people.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: sylvain 
Date:   2002-03-12 04:40

Just get rid of this thread it's bandwidth waste.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: IHL 
Date:   2002-03-12 07:34

Stand back everyone, I'll sort him out, I study psychology.

now lie down on zat couch and tell me about your childhood, ja?
vere you dropped on your head as a child hmmm?

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Mike Swaby 
Date:   2002-03-12 10:15

Dear Memebers of thisboard. I have never used this board before & I do play clarinet. The first I heard of this is when these messages turned up in my mail-box. I have since been contacted by a “friend” who has admitted to me he has been using my name and e-mail address & posing as me. I do not have any hard feelings towards any of you, as you were just uninformed of the situation, but I would like you from this point forth to stop associating me with these bogus messages.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: jez 
Date:   2002-03-12 10:46

If it's true that this Mike Swaby is the victim of a hoax by a "friend" then presumably it would be very much in his interest to block further contributions bearing his name. I'm sure it would be in all our interests to stop hearing from the perpetrator, whose stupid, puerile, offensive drivel I am sick of reading. (his spellings not too good either) I wonder if the hoaxer is the same 'Mike' as used to appear with the e-mail tool_46@hotmail.com

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: Dr. Webster 
Date:   2002-03-12 14:56

Although this message from Mike may of been a hoax, i must say in all my career as a doctor i have come across several people with the same feelings as "Mike" has been having.this condition is extremely serious and there have been over 100 proved cases. If Mike is a legitimate case and not a prank i must insist that he is giving more encouragment in life and maybe seeks medical attention by trained professionals to stop him from these outburts that keep upsetting everyone on here and especially his clarinet. please respect you musical instruments, they are pieces of art, not toys.

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: William 
Date:   2002-03-12 15:24

Funny how a pile of dung will attract so many flys (as I too, buzz in).

BTW, "Dr" Web., you seem to be reluctant to cap. your "I" word the same as the first posting from Mike and your grammer does not represent your supposed post graduate medical study--i.e., "over 100 proved (instead of proven or documented) cases." Makes me suspicious as to how many of these profound postings are actually the "ghost-postings" of one truely creative, but misguided, individual who has far too much computer time available under his fingers. My advice: turn off your screen and get back to the practice room and resume your long tones--which you may have already been sustaining too many seconds...........

And, to everyone else who may still be swarming around looking for a place to land, lets "buzz on" to better topics. Good Clarineting!!

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 RE: Feelings towards clarinets
Author: David Pegel 
Date:   2002-03-13 02:12

Isn't paranoia wonderful? I'm glad I'M legitimate!

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