 The Clarinet BBoard
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Author: Ken Shaw ★2017
Date: 2017-04-01 18:48
Normal woodwind instruments (flute, oboe, bassoon and even saxophone) overblow at the octave. This makes the fingerings of the registers match. By contrast, the clarinet overblows at the twelfth, producing unmatched sets of fingerings.
A study published today in the prestigious medical journal The Lancette has shown that the unmatched fingerings produce serious clashes in the synapses that interfere with the entire range of thinking. The author, Herr Professor Doctor Lirpa Loof, of the University of Southern North Dakota, found startling gaps in the reasoning of clarinetists that made them practically unable to follow normal paths of reasoning. "Thank goodness I switched from clarinet to kazoo in the Second Grade," he said. "otherwise I would have stayed a damn fool all my life."
In other news, Donald Trump has been discovered to be a secret clarinetist. This explains his strange Twitter postings, and many other things.
Ken Shaw
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Author: ruben
Date: 2017-04-01 20:29
Ken: another "post truth"? Donald Trump does not even know what a clarinet is. He plays, and has always played, the Sousaphone. His treatise: "Mastering Hot Air When Playing the Sousaphone" is a classic.
rubengreenbergparisfrance@gmail.com
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Author: fskelley
Date: 2017-04-01 22:51
You must not have heard about the frustrated doubler who modified both clarinet and saxophone to overblow at the 10th so he could stick with just one fingering pattern. Watch for a big announcement from Conn-Selmer in 2018, several major music schools and orchestras have already committed to going exclusively with the new system.
Stan in Orlando
EWI 4000S with modifications
Post Edited (2017-04-02 05:14)
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Author: Burt
Date: 2017-04-02 02:13
Ken, you picked the right day to post this article.
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Author: TomS
Date: 2017-04-02 06:25
Trump could use a little relaxation (?) from playing the clarinet or making music in some way ... For that matter, music participation and sharing among all politicians of the planet would make for better communication, understanding and honesty. A global ensemble ... let's turn the UN building into a concert hall for a New World Symphony Orchestra. But, who would conduct?
Maybe on 2nd thought, Trump might have a bad reed day and push him over the edge ... better take up the bass drum ...
Tom
Post Edited (2017-04-02 06:26)
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Author: Ed
Date: 2017-04-02 15:49
I read this article a number of times and cannot make any sense of it. What is wrong?
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Author: ned
Date: 2017-04-06 09:20
I twigged you were pulling our collective legs Ken when I read the bit ''...A study published today in the prestigious medical journal The Lancette...''
That's spelled LANCET now, isn't it?
Funny though...
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