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 oh poopy...
Author: Ashley 
Date:   2000-11-15 21:11

I know nobody cares, but i'm gonna say this anyway.. know how I said when I first found this message board about all-state and my not making it etc etc? well it starts tomorrow. After much "encouragement" from my director, i'm basically going along for the ride. its thursday through saturday, i get out of school friday and half of thursday, to go to Ames and watch rehearsals and probably be pretty bored the whole time. i think its gonna be pretty disappointing watching rehearsals, just knowing that i ***should*** be up there and i'm not, instead i'm sitting in the audience watching. Theyre letting me go cuz i'm a senior and havent made it, and blah blah blah.. everybodys telling me that i deserve to at least get to go.... pity in other words.....Grr... but what can ya do? oh well, sorry that pissed you off for some reason, it seems i've been doing that a lot lately :(
*ashley*

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Pam 
Date:   2000-11-15 21:20

Well, life sometimes includes disappointments. That is part of becoming an adult. I can understand feeling a little down about the whole thing, but your attitude can make a big difference over the next few days. If you are attending this thing with a really bad attitude, then what is the point of going?

I don't say this with an attitude of condemnation. Maybe just try to think of the bigger picture. What's going to matter next week, next year, 10-20 years down the road?

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Bill 
Date:   2000-11-15 22:49

Ashley: For some reason your email triggers, in my mind, the old expression "when the going gets tough, the tough get going." If it were me, and I know it's not, I would use the time to practice harder than I'd ever practiced before, with the goal of "fill in the blank". Many great people have had major setbacks, and in time achieved great things.

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Bob Arney 
Date:   2000-11-15 23:15

Ashley, I've reviewed all your e-mails and all I read speaks of a "pity-party." There is more to life than just one competition, or even six OR SEVEN.Not everybody sits first chair, or second. Maybe your director is hoping by your going that you may become more of a "team player" and smile a bit. Maybe it will even improve the "smile" muscles necessary for a better tone--at least it might give you a better attitude. Take your horn to the VA Hospital and play for the paralyzed veterans, or get involved in something OUTSIDE of "Ashley wants."
Bob A

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Daniel Bouwmeeszer 
Date:   2000-11-16 00:28

Bah.. what's an all state band ?

Just a bunch of amateurs making a bit of noise...

Next time try Geneva contest and you'll get a chair in the london symphony orchestra....

DOn't forget... you alwayz fail once before getting it right.

Yeah... you can be stressed one day and fail an audition (we all have)... but does this mean that you're a bad clarinetist ?

But just think at the positive sides of it. Yeah.... you didn't get in BUT, you had to work for getting the audition material right and you didn't loose this work....

Competitions are good because they give that extra pressure you need to work more and progress faster. Anyway..... that's why I do contests..... to keep me motivated for working...

But anyway you know.... competition don't say anything about your ability to do music... it's just a way to tell, "o.k. this one has good nerves and good technique".... but they usually forgett about feelings.

But if you are really pissed off, I would do something. This something is to do something even more chalenging than auditionning to the All state band... Let's say... taking part in a contest and win.. or someting like that...
You will get that "piss off" energy which will get you to make it.

I experienced a same dissapointment recently when I auditionned at the conservatory in Geneva.... Thomas Friedli, the clarinet professor, told me I was too old (at 18) to start a professional carreer (this meaning actually, that he didn't want me because I was not willing to become professional and because I was just staying a year in Switzerland). Basically I still managed to get private tuition with Friedli's rival, Steven Kanoff (who is as good as Friedli or even better.. ---> Amazon.com --> Steven Kanoff). He is preparing me for the International contest of Geneva...... I now have the rage to win just to piss off Friedli. I'm probably not gonna make it to the finals... but at least getting through eliminatories would be an exploit.

An injured animal is always very dangerous !

Think about it..

Best wishes

Daniel Bouwmeester
Geneva - Switzerland

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Karel V. 
Date:   2000-11-16 00:36

Ashley, why don'you go to the rehearsals with the idea of learning why perhaps you did not maka the grade, and what you can do about it? I would think that is why your schoolis willing to send you to Ames - they don't expect you to see watching as a reward. Use the experience and make it into a positive one.

Karel.

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Andy 
Date:   2000-11-16 01:18

Boo hoo for Ashley, she's finally realised that life isn't the easy ride she has been taking for years. About time you woke and realised that life is full of crap and the only way to become the best you can be, is to drive through it all head on and cop it sweet. No tears, no angry letters to people who don't deserve it, just keep on working. The more you get kicked in the guts the better, as when you finally do get some success you will really know what it feels like to be happy, and maybe then you will also see that like most things we do in life, it is just luck. One day you can be the best, then ext the worst. If you can't cop it, get out while you still can....

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: William 
Date:   2000-11-16 01:30

There is always a need for a few more trombone players.

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Ken Rasmussen 
Date:   2000-11-16 01:59

It is good to look at everything we do, and ask ourselves why we do it. Then, examine the reason. Is it a good reason? If it is a good reason, is what we are doing really addressing it? If it is a bad reason, then we need to not do what we have been doing, or put it on a different basis. My ambition, when I reach the end of my life, is to look back and like what I did and how I did it. I play clarinet for fun, for the challenge, and for what it can teach me and give to me. I'm amply repaid for my efforts. I'm happy.

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Ashley 
Date:   2000-11-16 02:26

Andy-

OK, whoa, do NOT start on me. You do NOT know the situation, and if you did you wouldnt say that. I never said that life was an "easy ride", mine has been far from it. Excuse me for thinking that working my ass off for hours every day for years wouldnt get me into freaking all-state. It must have been horrible of me to assume that the better person accomplishes things, and the worse person doesnt, because that's not what happened. Do not assume you know what your're talking about; you dont. Dont think you know what i've been though; you dont. I've gotten kicked in the guts plenty of times, believe me. Excuse me for thinking that something good would happen to me for once after all the work i put in.

Sorry for the rest of you who read that, I dont mean to be a bitch, i just am sometimes. we all are. Sorry, i dont put up with any crap from anybody.

This subject is dead now, dont even bother replying if all you have to give is criticism.

-ashley-

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Kontragirl 
Date:   2000-11-16 03:25

Ashley--
I'm sorry you didn't make it into All-State. As a senior, you probably feel like it's the end of the world because you don't GET another chance at All-State. I think it was kind of your band director to invite you to go, watch and learn. I'm also sorry you can't appriciate that.

Some people work hard their whole life and never get anywhere. You should at least look around and be thankful that you're as talented as you are, and see that you aren't the best, but you most certainly aren't the worst. If you're going to work hard, do it for yourself.

I'm not trying to be offensive, I'm trying to be sympathetic, but it's hard to write emotions other than :o), :o| and, :o(

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: bob gardner 
Date:   2000-11-16 04:32

When we are positive --positive happens.
When we are negative--sh-- happens.
Take your choice

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Kim L. 
Date:   2000-11-16 19:35

I never made All-State either. I also didn't get into the three music departments I auditioned for on the first try. I did, however, reaudition and get accepted my freshman year of college.

Just remember: @!#$ happens. Turn that @!#$ into something you can remember.

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Lisa Chien 
Date:   2000-11-16 20:40

Ashley,
I am a freshman at famous New York Conservatory; I'll probably major in clarinet performance. I can tell you that during my High School years making All-State was very, very important to me. I worked hard and made All-State all four years in High School. But I think the essesntial ingredient here is talent. I know one guy who really did practice more than everyone else; he did everything: chromatic, dynamically changing long tones, Rose Etudes, intervals, scales up to seven sharps and flats, jazz scales, the majority of the clarinet repetoire and could transpose for both his Bb and A clarinet on sight. But his playing was boring, without inspiriation. It was as if he thought of himself as a wind machine and never varied the flow of air coming from his lungs. The primary reason he never made All-State was because you literally fell asleep while he played.
After four years of playing clarinet in HS, and realizing that he really didn't have the talent needed to become really excellent, he decided to change his focus. Now he is at an Ivy League school majoring in pre-med. His failures and lack of ability in playing clarinet helped him to refocus his energies into a field where his talents better apply.
While making All-State was an important goal, now that I'm at a university where everyone here was perhaps the best player at his or her respective High School and everyone here has certainly made at least All-State, now that were in college all those "achievements" in High School seem so insignificant.
Don't fret. Once you get to college you will quickly forget the HS past. Use this as an opportunity to refocus your life and really go for something that you are really talented at and where you can really make a difference.
Good luck!

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Gordon (NZ) 
Date:   2000-11-17 10:31

A shame this thread hasn't got a more relevant and descriptive name. I keep wasting time clicking on it to find out what it is. A pity my memory is not better too.

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Nate Zeien 
Date:   2000-11-17 15:56

Gordon, I disagree. We should be glad that the message has nothing to do with the thread name. :-) -- Nate Zeien

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Jodi 
Date:   2000-11-17 17:31


I never went to All-State. I wanted to, but never had the chance to audition and now that I am older and wiser (six years older and wiser; big deal, right?) I realize that I would have NEVER made it anyway.

I started high school knowing no note above the break.

I left as first chair, having gone to two district fests and a festival in Lake Placid.

In college, I started very low. I was the worst player at the school. I was not accepted to UConn for music which is where I REALLY wanted to go. I worked really really hard over the last five years and I am currently sharing principal seat in orchestra and band, playing 1st and Eb in VT Winds and have gone to the Intercollegiate Band Festval four times (I am planning on going yet again this year.) I have also been nominated to go to a national band fest.

My point? $%&* happens. It's no big deal. I feel that if I can succeed, anyone can. (I HATE to practice, btw... )

All-State auditions are very hard. You may be competing against someone who has been taking private lessons for YEARS and could have a better instrument. You may have done the best YOU could do and that is what counts. If you feel that YOU played to the best of your ability, then be happy. If not, keep in mind that there will be other oppertunities.

I once heard a quote that we look so long at the closed door that we never see the open window... Find the window!!

Best of luck to you!!

Jodi

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 RE: oh poopy...
Author: Nicole Y. 
Date:   2000-11-17 20:04

Ashley...just try to enjoy the ride. I can understand being put down by a lot of people here about being sad that I didn't make Regionals or whatever. You're getting out of school, and hey, at least you'll hear some *or should hear* decent music. Even though you're not out there playing with them, at least you get to hear them. I remember when I made alternate last year, I was put into a room right next to the band and I got to hear them. It made me want to cry, but at least I know what I need to do this year. Cheer up. I know you worked hard, but music isn't everything. I'm sure you have a lot else going for you, and after all, don't you have this free trip?

Much love,
Nikki

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 RE: oh poopy.../to Lisa Chien
Author: Steve Epstein 
Date:   2000-11-18 01:21

Was this guy really untalented? Or just not as talented as you? Sounds like if he'd worked less hard he might have enjoyed himself more, finding the time to feel the "inspiration". I have met many players (of all instruments) in the folk music world who cannot do a lot of stuff, such as play in certain keys, or read music, for example, but their playing is quite inspiring and they are quite talented.

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 RE: oh poopy.../to Lisa Chien
Author: Nate Zeien 
Date:   2000-11-20 00:06

Excellent point Steve! Mechanics are good, but there has to be more than that. One of the greatest klezmer clarinetists, Naftule Brandwein, couldn't even read music! It was not musical training that made his famous, but rather his style. This seems to be somewhat common in folk music. You have musicians who cannot read music, yet have the ability through their music to touch your heart and stir your soul in ways mere mechanics could not even begin. I myself have a tendency to prefer style over mechanics. A few of my favorite things to play are klezmer and jazz clarinet, and Irish & Scottish fiddle. I still work on the ol' etudes and scales on clarinet, even though they aren't my favorite part. Violin for me is a whole other story, I can't play much other than folk music, and a few common keys. -- Nate Zeien

PS - As a very smart fellow once said referring to a orchestra he was directing - "Sometimes the only dynamics are the ones in the the musicians' heads." I think he had a good point there...

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 RE: oh poopy.../to Lisa Chien
Author: Lindsey 
Date:   2000-12-10 03:10

Ashley, not making it to All-State isn't the end of the world. Not that I don't completely understand! I worked very hard last year and finally made it into District Honor Band but missed All-State by a few points. I would have given anything to get to go and sit in on those rehersals, though, and learn something new that I could apply later on. Now I've been in college 5 months and the things I did in High School--Marching Band, Concert Band, German Band, Pep Band, District Honors, All-Area Honors, and Director's Award don't mean anything to the people I play with. I was so happy to make it into Wind Symphony at my school this year--they're going to record a CD in Feb. and go to Europe on tour in May, it was the highlight of everything that I've been doing--the director is the one who convinced me to come to this school. Then Wed. he walked up to me at the beginning of rehersal--in front of other members--and said "Lindsey, it just isn't working out w/ the group. I'm sorry, you're no longer in Wind Symphony. You can get your money back from Europe." and then just walked away from me. Think how that feels? I'm a Music Ed major. Take advantage of every opportunity you get--even if it is just sitting in on a rehersal you're upset about cause you can't play in. Maybe you'll learn something that can make you better so when something cooler comes up you can ace it and say "Ha ha" to the people in your mind that have kept you down. That's what I'm aiming for! Sorry you didn't make it. :( , I know that it probably meant a lot to you just like WS did to me.
Another sad player,
Lindsey

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