Author: 3dogmom
Date: 2009-02-15 18:16
I feel compelled to say that those of you who are advising "pushing" children along a certain path are likely to risk alienation and possible blame if things don't work out. I'm a little shocked that so many are fans of that idea.
They need to choose, themselves, the school that feels right for them, cost permitting. If cost does not permit, they can take out student loans which they can pay back if that is their choice. I don't like that idea, but it's one way out of the dilemma.
We visited many, many schools. At some, my daughter was turned off, sometimes by fairly insignificant (to me) things. But if she didn't like it, she didn't like it. My insisting on sending her there would have accomplished only hard feelings.
She's at the school she chose, and doing quite well. She's not a music major, by the way, never was going to be, although she excelled in voice in high school.
To those who argue against letting your children do whatever they want, I must say that wshe and I talk about her future frequently. She's smart enough not to waste her time at a major that's not likely to get her employed, but wants to do something she enjoys and can be successful at. I make suggestions - she listens. You cannot make your child do what you want them to do. Hopefully you have created a bond whereby they listen to your advice, and the advice of others they trust, and then make a decision which is based on their interests and common sense. Not yours, but theirs.
Sue
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The Clarinet BBoard
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