 The Clarinet BBoard
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Author: SavvyClarinet
Date: 2007-06-22 17:56
The other day while I was giving a lesson to a beginning clarinetist, we began discussing scales and arpeggios. I described the different key signatures, notes of different scales, and their similar topics. When he began to understand how they worked, I told him to play the C Major Scale. After he played his first scale, I told him to play the arpeggio. Here's our hilarious conversation:
"Okay, now for the arpeggio."
"No thanks, I'm not hungry."
"Ummm. . . okay, play the arpeggio."
"Wait, does that have to do with scales?"
( I explained what an arpeggio was).
"Oh, I thought arpeggios were a type of cereal!"
That definitely made my day. After the lesson, I had a bowl of "arpeggi-O's". I think he might have been on to something.
Anyone wish to share funny quotes or sayings from students?
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Author: redwine
Date: 2007-06-22 19:48
Hello,
I don't have students, but this very funny occurrence happened last week at the OU clarinet symposium.
An older gentleman sat at a booth to test mouthpieces. This is the third year in a row that I've seen him doing this, but he's never purchased a mouthpiece. In speaking to him, I learned that he's a pediatrician, I'd guess about 70 years old. After trying the mouthpieces again, he says "yesterday, two little boys were circumcised, so this year, I can buy a mouthpiece"!
My wife and I laughed for about 5 minutes.
[ Slightly edited. mark C. ]
Ben Redwine, DMA
owner, RJ Music Group
Assistant Professor, The Catholic University of America
Selmer Paris artist
www.rjmusicgroup.com
www.redwinejazz.com
www.reedwizard.com
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Author: skygardener
Date: 2007-06-23 04:40
A piano professor at my school always loved the phrase, 'I played it much better at home.'
He had that phrase in every language he knew on the white board in his office. When there was a new iternational student he would always ask them to add to the board in their language.
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Author: ZCClarinet
Date: 2007-06-23 06:12
I remember going through some sonata in a formal lesson, I got to a point of 3-4 rests which I knew at this point the teacher did not want me to count. So, after finishing the phrase prior to the rests, I stated haphazardly: "bla bla bla..." in a blasé-"etcetera etcetera"-glossing-over-unimportant-parts (at least for this lesson) kind of tone and promptly picked up with the next phrase. My teacher cracked up, and, after I get to section boundary, says it was something he never heard before and jokingly added that he thought he should incorporate it into his own studies.
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Author: LarryBocaner ★2017
Date: 2007-06-23 14:31
Some years ago I had a lapel pin made up reading "I played it perfect (sic) at home!" I mounted it under my shirt collar and each time a student told me "IPIPAH"(after butchering and etude) I folded down my collar and showed him the badge while telling them: "Oh. I've never heard that before!"
My favorite (?) is the student who leaves his books behind in my studio and turns up at his next lesson a week later and tells me that he has practiced his lesson every day but just couldn't locate his books before he left the house today!
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Author: donald
Date: 2007-06-23 14:40
"i don't understand, what is the difference between a one beat note and a two beat note" (note- this student could identify the time values, so was not refering to visual recognition issues)
donald
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Author: Connor
Date: 2007-06-23 17:53
how about a funny teacher quote:
half way though a lesson mr. X continues to sit on the couch with a contemplative expression on his face, then retorts to my thirty mintues of playing "i think im hung over" (monday morning at 10:30). The assistant professor "I don't know of a good clarinet player that doen't drink".
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Author: elmo lewis
Date: 2007-06-24 16:45
A beginner came to study with me after being with another teacher. The next lesson in the method was 6/8 time and after explaining it to him I asked if he had any questions. He replied, "I just have one question. What position should my diaphragm be in when I play 6/8 time?"
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Author: pewd
Date: 2007-06-24 18:55
I gave a clinic, and noted that one of the students instruments had no thumb rest. I queried the student, and he informed me he didn't know what it was for, so he removed it and threw that spare part away...
Larry, I want one of those lapel pins
- Paul Dods
Dallas, Texas
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Author: tictactux ★2017
Date: 2007-06-24 19:16
Well, this one's actually a teacher quote (me being the student):
One day I played one of my "homework" pieces, and he said "hey, well done, rhythm, articulation, dynamics, really well. But now, <cough>, let's go back to the sheet and see if we can play it the way it is written."
--
Ben
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Author: SavvyClarinet
Date: 2007-06-24 21:58
I have a lot of quotes from band. I used to sit next to my two best friends, and they never failed to crack me up. We always joked about who was the best, and whenever one messed up, they would say, "Well, at least I'm still sexy!"
Also, while we were in a heated discussion over who could play the highest, I said, "I'm the best times infinite!" to which one replied, "I'm the best infinite times one!!!" I guess the high notes killed a few brain cells.
One of them was OCD, so after he would tune, I would play slightly flat or sharp and he would retune. When he was satisfied again, I would play in tune, and he would be the one out of tune. When that failed, there's always the classic penny in the barrel trick. Or switching soprano reeds with bass or Eb reeds.
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Author: Klarinet
Date: 2007-06-25 13:49
I explained to my flute student, who occasionaly plays such wonderful variations on her pieces as Ben does, about dividing times (in 6/8) into 8th notes.
Question: How many 8th notes should we play in stead of a quarter note?
Students answer: 2
Question: How many 8th notes should we play to have the value of an 8th note?
Student answer: I don't know, 4?
I asked her again and again. She couldn't come up with the right answer and I couldn't stop laughing anymore.
Goele
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Author: DAVE
Date: 2007-06-25 20:10
Me: "That half note is on the downbeat."
Student (12th grade!): "Now when you say 'downbeat', what exactly do you
mean?"
.............................................................
And my fav!
Me talking to a 3rd grader playing a Lyons C clar:
"When I play that I do it this way..."
Wise beyond her years student after a moment of contemplation:
"Well you are you and I am me..."
I was speachless!
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Author: Jacqueline
Date: 2007-06-26 13:45
"you are you and I am me" - that is hilarious!!!
OK, this isn't as funny as that but this was the conversation of me teachig an 8 year old how fast Crotchet = 60bpm is...
Me: "Now, if you have a look at your watch (it was an anologue watch) you will see the second hand moving at exactly 60beats per minute and so that is how fast we will now play."
Student looks at me in a very confused sort of way "I don't get it?"
Me: "Well, look at it moving...now...now...now...now"
Student: "Ooooooh, now I get it. But that's not the second hand, that's the third hand"
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Author: Garret
Date: 2007-06-26 19:52
My teacher told me one of his younger students was playing at his lesson. When he played a throat tone A he got a gurgling noise. The told the teacher, "I have water in my A hole."
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Author: Jacqueline
Date: 2007-06-27 14:14
A friend of mine took a classical clarinet to a lesson one time and he and his student got to talking about how long the clarinet has been around
Friend: So, do you know how long the clarinet has been around for?
Student: Oh, wow, hundreads of years....in fact....Jesus played the clarinet!
Amen!
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Author: MaggieMay
Date: 2007-06-28 18:52
My teacher, who is pretty sarcastic, once complained "How can you play a scale that badly when you know I haven't had lunch yet".
He also expressed his hope that Santa would bring me a new pair of ears for Christmas....
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