 The Clarinet BBoard
|
Author: Jule
Date: 2004-12-03 01:14
This may seem alittle out of the ordinary, but really, I need the help!
To make a VERY long story short. I own rats and one recently born rat happend to find a home in my eefer. He's stuck and i've tried EVERYTHING to get the darn thing out. He's been in there for a day and nothing is working. Please throw some advice that would keep the rat in working condition and the clarinet! Odd? Oh yea....
: 0
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: VermontJM
Date: 2004-12-03 01:21
Time for the vet maybe? Or a repairman? If he doesn't eat, he's not going to make it, is he?
I hope this works out (for the rat's sake...)
Good luck! That's the most interesting thing I have heard all day!
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: jArius
Date: 2004-12-03 01:29
Without a vet's help I don't really see how you can keep both the clarinet and the rat intact. Normally I would suggest lubrication, but that would probably damage the instrument, and since baby rats are hairless, that could possibly harm the rat as well. When all's said and done, I don't think the rat is going to be alive at the end of this. It's a shame, because I like rats too.
PS. this is the most unusual post I've ever seen on this BBoard.
Jeremy Bruins
Proud member of the too-much-time-on-my-hands club.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: GBK
Date: 2004-12-03 02:10
Finally, a good use for the Eb clarinet...GBK
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: GBK
Date: 2004-12-03 03:56
Q: How do you know your rat is hungry?
A: He's breathing.
...GBK
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: ned
Date: 2004-12-03 05:33
''If he doesn't eat, he's not going to make it, is he?''
If the rat doesn't eat, it will lose weight and should come out OK. Then again...........you could be pulling collective legs!
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: mags
Date: 2004-12-03 09:44
I don't know what an eefer is but if it's part of the clarinet you could perhaps use a long pencil ( the rubber end of course)..Mgt x
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Rick Williams
Date: 2004-12-03 11:17
Alrighty, I think I may have a solution that might get the little begger out and net you some cash as well.
Get a cork to plug one end of the eefer section, drill a hole through the cork.
Get some vegitable oil and lightly oil the bore in front of the rat.
Find a friend with good hand/eye coordination. A baseball player would be perfect!
You'll need 1 butterfly net.
You'll need another friend with a video camera.
After you oil the bore, plug the end of the eefer with the cork. Go to a nearby garage and have a mechanic stick the end of a compressed air nozzle into the hole in the cork while you cover all the holes and close the keys. Position your basball player down field from the open end of the eefer with the net. As you do all this, have the other friend video tape the proceedings.
On cue, have the mechanic pull the trigger on the air nozzle. Rat Cannon!
Rat flies out and is caught in net.
Submit video to all the funny home video shows and cash in!
Seriously though, hope the patient and eefer do well!
Rick
Best
Rick
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: FrankM
Date: 2004-12-03 12:09
I had a parrot named Sinbad for many years...when I practiced my tenor sax, he would sit on the bell and nibble at my figers and the keys of the horn...I thought it was cute....until one day in mid phrase, the horn started to sound sort of stuffy....he had leaned over too far, lost his grip and slid down into the bell! He was upside down, wings pinned against his side, and he was squaking up a storm...When I looked down in there, I could see his feet and tail feathers. My hand was too big to get far enough in there, so my wife had to pull him out by his tail feathes...which evidently birds find annoying. Funny thing was, Sinbad blamed my wife for the whole incident. Eventually all was forgotten, but for awhile there, when the tenor case came out, Sinbad flew back to his cage and stayed there until I was done.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Synonymous Botch
Date: 2004-12-03 12:13
There are less involved techniques for emulating an oboe...
I wonder if a darkened room with a flashlight at the "head end" would encourage your rodent to crawl?
Just when I thought clarinet players were reaching toward normalcy...
At least it's not a Furby.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Don Berger
Date: 2004-12-03 13:47
Wow, I sure cant suggest more than R W's detailed instructions. I am impelled to ask about squeeking problems, and our small friend's reaction to the cat part in Peter and the Wolf ! While asking questions, how about the Momerats and Furbys, can they help extricate?? Don
Thanx, Mark, Don
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: William
Date: 2004-12-03 14:24
At last, a way to rid NYC of it's rat infestation problem--place an effer (or two) on every street corner, every alleyway, every basement, storeroom and in every garbage container, and soon, Letterman will have no more little critters to joke about in his monologes.
And (more importantly) finally a good use for effers.
(maybe the technique used for removing stuck swabs..................)
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Ken Shaw ★2017
Date: 2004-12-03 15:22
Back to getting the rat out. Try holding the effer bell down and tapping the bell on a tabletop covered with a towel.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: John Stackpole
Date: 2004-12-03 19:27
Research Assignment:
A.A. Milne's "Winnie-the-Pooh", Chapter II: "In which Pooh Goes Visiting and Gets Into a Tight Place".
Perhaps you could hang your bore-swab out to dry on rattie's feet while you wait ....
JDS
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Todd W.
Date: 2004-12-03 19:29
Ahh, the old "rat stuck in the Eb clarinet" problem.
When you do get the rat out, I hope you will have learned that rats do not make good clarinet swabs, no matter how long their tail is. They always get stuck on the register key vent. (It doesn't matter which end you start swabbing from.)
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Jule
Date: 2004-12-03 19:38
Well I ended up haveing to do some tedious work to end up pulling out a dead rat. Nothing more exciting than pulling a dead rat from your bell!
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: LeWhite
Date: 2004-12-03 23:08
That's horrible, I'm sorry it turned out that way. To be honest I can't believe how many people joked about this.
__________________
Don't hate me because I play Leblanc! ![[down]](http://test.woodwind.org/clarinet/BBoard/smileys/smiley23.gif) Buffet
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: sfalexi
Date: 2004-12-04 02:39
That is a shame. I had a pet gerbil (wanted a rat, but mother wouldn't allow it) and I can relate. I was bummed when Buddy (as I dubbed him) passed on. Sorry to hear it.
US Army Japan Band
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: saxlite
Date: 2004-12-04 04:47
Rats!! But, out this way, banana slugs get into things.......on a more serious note, this is by far the least educational but definitely most entertaining post I've seen on this BB in a while; lots of creativity, especially the "rat cannon" solution. Would like to have seen that video....
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: OpusII
Date: 2004-12-04 10:34
I'm sorry to hear that Jule. I agree with LeWhite, can't believe how many people joked about this...
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Synonymous Botch
Date: 2004-12-04 12:12
"can't believe how many people joked about this..."
Then you don't understand pathos, the foundation of Western humor.
Most of us find nothing so mortifying as being singled from the Crowd for ridicule. Many of us find nothing funnier...
This is the basis for so many dreary "reality" television shows.
I, for one, was intrigued by the rat cannon concept.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: OpusII
Date: 2004-12-04 12:49
Synonymous Botch,
Never heard of the Western humor, but I think it is allright then
Post Edited (2004-12-04 12:50)
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Don Berger
Date: 2004-12-04 13:41
Jule - Fpr myself and hopefully for most of us, if our feeble "humor" attempts to try to find a bit of solace, along with hopes for a successful outcome seem/are rude, please forgive us. Most of us have a pet or so, which show their affection for food and care in a variety of ways, and we like/love them. Our stray cat, White Paws, in which we have $150 invested, is our latest. Our granddaughter, desireing a pet-raising career, had several snakes [non-poisonous], growing up in rural households with catS and dogS, so you are not alone with unusual pets. Find another. Don
Thanx, Mark, Don
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Jule
Date: 2004-12-05 16:31
Honestly I think it's the funniest thing i've encountered with clarinet troubles. I wasn't attached to the rat. They multiply so fast I don't know any of them apart. But thanks for the sympathy anyways.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: VermontJM
Date: 2004-12-05 21:43
I really do feel badly for the rat. That's sad...
Conversely, it's just one of those things that one can't help but laugh at... I mean a RAT in an EEFER. It's just kind of funny. I wish the outcome had been better...
Do you remember a few years ago the clarinet that got blown up here in Burlington VT? There was a bomb scare at school, the police were called in, did a search and the dogs kept targetting this one clarinet case. So they thought it was a bomb, dragged it outside (in full bomb blowing up gear stuff) and proceeded to blow up the clarinet. There was no bomb. They think the kid (or a previous kid who had rented it) had maybe carried fireworks or sparklers or something the case at some time...
The post (I think) was titled "And the clarinet went BOOM!!!"
My sympathies to the rat and its family. I hope the eefer turned out better off...
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Steve Epstein
Date: 2004-12-06 03:27
There was someone who called in on Car Talk today with a gecko in the instrument panel. ![[grin]](http://test.woodwind.org/clarinet/BBoard/smileys/smilie5.gif)
Steve Epstein
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: kfeder@hotmail.com
Date: 2004-12-07 18:37
Sorry about the rat, but I've been thinking lately about what is and is not appropriate as subjects of humor. Recall the Monty Python dead parrot sketch? I think even most bird lovers find that funny.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Dori
Date: 2004-12-08 03:44
This little creature has now touched so many lives, all because of its choice of the clarinet. Sob!
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: Gordon (NZ)
Date: 2004-12-14 05:50
The canon thing could not possibly work.
When you squash something - say an eraser - in one direction, it expands in directions at right angels to the original direction.
"Poissons ratio" for any given material, defines the extent to which this happens.
So as the compressed air tried to push ratty out, ratty would have expanded and jammed more.
Just like of you have a rag jammed in a clarinet you can never PUSH it out.
Or if you have a finger skin jammed in a ring, you cannot push it out (i.e. pull the ring off). You grab the skin behind the ring and PULL the finger out.
Thjis concept works in reverse.... If you pull something )most materials) in one direction, it shrinks in a direction at right angles to the pull.
So pulling ratty's tail would have been the most successful approach, presumably he went head first into the big end of the eefer.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
Author: msloss
Date: 2004-12-14 12:48
I hear that Genzyme is working on a two-tailed rat to be marketed under the Gigliotti name that makes it possible to pull it out of the instrument regardless of which end it goes in.
|
|
Reply To Message
|
|
The Clarinet Pages
|
 |
.jpg){kind=small}
.jpg){kind=small}
.jpg){kind=small}
.jpg){kind=small}
.jpg){kind=small}
.jpg){kind=small}
