 The Clarinet BBoard
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Author: janlynn
Date: 2009-08-13 19:41
so the day/night of my recital has finally arrived. its 4 hours away and i am already getting nervous. 1986 was the last time and only time I had a recital.
i keep telling myself to breathe and relax.
i tell myself to pretend its just like in practice and imagine no one in the room.
i tell myself - have fun.
i tell myself its no big deal - just play
but i still feel that fluttering feeling. i dont know how to calm my nerves a bit.
any advice?
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Author: EEBaum
Date: 2009-08-13 19:53
Don't imagine nobody in the room... I find that counterproductive. Rather, realize that everyone there (well, most of the time anyways) is there because they want to hear something musical played well. They're not there to count your mistakes, they're not there waiting for you to mess up. They're there to hear music.
I also find it very liberating to make the music the focus of the event. A bit trickier when it's your recital, but still doable. If you approach it as "Here is a concert of ME PLAYING CLARINET, now you can all come and see how well I play it" then you have already placed a lot of unnecessary pressure on yourself, and you have created an environment where everything is a reflection on you. Instead, make it an event of "Here is a concert of me presenting A LOT OF GOOD MUSIC, and now you can hear what I think is a cool way of playing it." Mentally, your job then becomes to draw out every bit of coolness you can find in the music, which is a heck of a lot more fun and less stressful for you, and more enjoyable for the audience.
There are lots of more long-term tactics I'd suggest, but since you're 4 hours off, I don't know how helpful something like learning to play the first movement of the Mozart as if it were a polka or tango would be.
-Alex
www.mostlydifferent.com
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Author: janlynn
Date: 2009-08-13 19:59
awsome advice!!! Thank You! dont have time to learn the mozart tango right now. lol one day i will give it a try tho.
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Author: EEBaum
Date: 2009-08-13 20:40
As for it not being a big deal, I both agree and disagree with that. Any time I perform anything, it both is and isn't a big deal. It isn't a big deal in that I should have no concern about how the outcome of the music will affect me or my future or some cause or the state of music appreciation or my mom's cancer operation. It is a big deal in that it is an opportunity to make music for an audience, and with each opportunity to make music there is the possibility of something fantastic and remarkable happening.
I never have an expectation that something fantastic or remarkable WILL happen... that is, I won't get upset if it doesn't. There also isn't really a formula to make it happen, nor will it always happen for everyone involved. However, I do best when I put everything I can into the performance to try to make it happen. When it does, sometimes for a few seconds, sometimes for a whole concert, everything is suddenly worthwhile.
That you have the possibility of this happening at every performance is a very big deal. However, it is only a big deal in that something great could happen, and not that there may be some horrid consequence if nothing does. I've seen countless performances of very good ensembles where nothing special happens.
One of my most fulfilling moments was during a placement audition during my undergrad... I was playing the first movement of John Adams' Gnarly Buttons, and I was completely into it. It was by far the best I'd played it, and I was completely involved in the music... so much so that I was really upset when the committee cut me off (just before my favorite part) and said that was enough. It was all I could do to keep from screaming "I'M NOT DONE YET," or refusing to stop, which would likely have shot me toward the bottom of the placement results for being a jerk.
That's what I mean when I say it is and isn't a big deal, and that's what I aim for when performing... my only concern was the music. I didn't care about "showing what I can do," and I almost threw out what most would consider the big deal, in fact the entire purpose of the performance -- getting a good spot in ensembles for the year -- because I was too involved in what, to me, really IS the big deal... a moment of musical excellence.
-Alex
www.mostlydifferent.com
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Author: EEBaum
Date: 2009-08-13 20:44
To add to that, sometimes the amazing or remarkable thing will happen toward the end of a concert that had been poor, even disastrous until then, and can also happen in very unexpected ways. Never write off a concert because things start off sketchy.
-Alex
www.mostlydifferent.com
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Author: Katrina
Date: 2009-08-13 20:46
You're going to do really well! Just remember that the audience wants to hear you succeed! They're on your side. You can entertain them!
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Author: Ed Palanker
Date: 2009-08-14 00:09
Wine! (Just kidding of course, you could also drink beer.) ESP http://eddiesclarinet.com
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Author: janlynn
Date: 2009-08-14 01:36
thanks for the advice everyone. I took it all to heart and everything went very very well. (Ed I stuck with the wine) lol
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Author: weberfan
Date: 2009-08-14 01:56
Congratulations!
By the way, what selection or selections did you play?
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Author: Joel K.
Date: 2009-08-14 04:03
Glad it went well. I've posted this before but I'll repeat it nonetheless. I once asked Mitchell Lurie (who I met at a festival) about performance nerves. He told me to look at it as "an opportunity, not an ordeal". I think that's good advice (though I still have bouts of nerves).
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Author: Morrigan
Date: 2009-08-14 08:37
I was about to go on stage once doing a duet with a percussionist, it was a difficult work and I told her I was nervous. She said "Excellent! Go with it; the nerves and adrenalin is what it's all about!" and she was right. The nerves are what separates a performance from just any other practice session or rehearsal. When you go on stage, it isn't practice, it isn't a rehearsal, this is it.
I think what I'm trying to say is don't try and get rid of the nerves; learn to work with them. Expect them, and expect that things will be different from any rehearsal you had prior; all you can do to prepare is make sure you know that you have practised and have it how you want it. The nerves will add that little bit of sparkle to it all!
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Author: Rob Vitale
Date: 2009-08-14 23:10
yeah, my trills sparkle when I'm nervous. When I played rhapsody in Blue at GMU, I don't think I ever trilled better in my life.
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Author: Koo Young Chung
Date: 2009-08-14 23:10
Someone asked similar question to James Galway,flutist,at Ravinia concert this summer.
His answer:
You have to find a new job.
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Author: Carol Dutcher
Date: 2009-08-15 22:57
The most-est, worst-est, sick-est feeling I have ever had did not involve the clarinet at all, it was the day that the banjo player did NOT show up for our performance, we had been well paid, and were to be televised in an enormous retirement center. There were five of us, supposedly six with him. But the show must go on. And it did. And when I watch the video I received in the mail afterwards, I was suprised to see and hear that it went well without him! And also that none of us looked nervous at all!!! And the retirement center still plays our little concert once in a while.
Glad to hear that your performance went well for you.
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Author: weberfan
Date: 2009-08-15 23:54
Carol: Where WAS the banjo player? And did you ever talk to him again?
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Author: quintet_op115
Date: 2009-08-16 23:23
David Blumberg wrote:
You can get Butterflies in your stomach, just make them fly in formation.......
That is beautiful advice, David. A wise clarinettist named Deborah Chodacki once told me that and it is certainly true. Basically, what they mean by that is if you have good habits (correct embouchure, descent air support, etc.) that will take care of the butterflies. At first you will usually feel nervous but once you find out that you are playing fine, you will gradually feel less anxious.
As for the physicological part, just imagine right before you audition that you have finished it and you did fine. That should help you be more determined to do it and play well.
Post Edited (2009-08-16 23:25)
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Author: stebinus2
Date: 2009-08-18 07:47
I look at "nerves" a little differently than most. I see them as the energy that you get from other people when they give you their attention. This is actually a good thing because you can use this energy as a tool to enhance your performance and make it more intense and powerful. You are not used to processing this kind of attention/energy in normal life so your whole mind and body can tend to be overwhelmed, hence the feeling of fear or nerves. First you should try to know your material down cold so you don't have to think about the technical matters so much and can just flow your expression from your heart and soul. Secondly when you practice and when you perform put your attention as much as possible into the present moment. This keeps you grounded in reality and avoids all the extraneous thoughts that might distract you from what you are doing. Also the more you perform the more you will learn to deal with and actually make use of this energy so take every opportunity to do so. One good place I have found to practice performance is nursing and retirement homes as they are usually a less critical audience and greatly appreciate your efforts. I'm sure there are many other places to share your music that not only give you experience but also let others benefit from your gift. I think the music educational system in general doesn't place enough weight on performance. Professional musicians in other less schooled genres usually get more experience performing and their ease at dealing with it is as a result much better than the average college graduate. After all, isn't performance one of the primary reasons we play the instrument? In my opinion it should be.
Post Edited (2009-08-18 07:49)
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Author: EEBaum
Date: 2009-08-18 08:11
Stebinus makes a great point about putting your attention into the present moment. I had a bizarre experience premiering an unaccompanied piece for a friend. Things weren't going horribly, but I botched things occasionally, namely a bunch of glissandi. I had this moment of realization about halfway through the performance that I was in complete autopilot. It was like I was just an observer, watching myself play the notes, hoping the next bar would turn out well, and being bummed out if it didn't.
I wasn't, however, really an active participant in the matter. I missed a stupidly easy note, and I thought to myself, "how could I miss that one?"
The thought process continued. I allowed autopilot to continue while I analyzed why I had missed that note. Did I see the note coming? Yes. Did I know the fingering for that note? Yes. Did I actually remember pressing down the fingers for that note? NO!!!!!
I hit a panic, as I was now stuck on autopilot, and seemingly had no way to break out of it. Notes were coming up, notes were played, and I seemed to have no input as to what was actually happening. The performance went on, and I was still getting through things and it was sounding OK... I just somehow wasn't really a part of it.
Desperate, I looked ahead at a low F coming up in a few bars. Do I know that note? Yes, it's an F. Do I know how to finger it? Yes, it requires these fingers. OK, now when I say GO, actually make a concerted effort to physically be involved in pressing those fingers down!
I did, and I snapped out of it, and I was an active participant in the rest of the piece, which went considerably better from that point. Since then, I've always made sure I have something to express, something to focus on, something to try differently when playing, to keep from falling into auto-pilot mode, which I'm fairly convinced comes from repeated rote practice without thought as to what is going on in the music.
This is why, when practicing a piece, I got into the habit of doing something at least slightly different every time, a habit I've found both fulfilling and liberating, and that I think has greatly broadened my musical horizons. I highly recommend always having multiple possibilities available for any spot in any piece of music, which is why I recommended playing the Mozart as a polka or tango in my first post. It's an extreme interpretation, and you probably won't do it in a concert (unless it's one I'm putting on), but it opens possibilities.
-Alex
www.mostlydifferent.com
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Author: quintet_op115
Date: 2009-08-18 10:21
Katrina wrote:
"You're going to do really well! Just remember that the audience wants to hear you succeed! They're on your side. You can entertain them!"
That sadly depends where you are. If you are at more competitive environment, that isn't always the truth. I've known people who would be excited to go to concerts to hear someone mess up. When somebody is auditioning at a place like The Curtis Institute, that person probably is not looking foward to hearing someone ace their audition. Concerto competitions is another place.
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Author: quintet_op115
Date: 2009-08-18 10:31
EEBaum wrote:
"They're not there to count your mistakes, they're not there waiting for you to mess up. They're there to hear music."
That is not always true as well. In the environment I come from, some people judge other musician's performances on how many mistakes that person has made.
I don't mean to come off bleak and negative, I am just reporting what can happen in a serious atmosphere.
Post Edited (2009-08-18 10:32)
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Author: EEBaum
Date: 2009-08-18 15:13
I know that a few do, but most don't. If I know a couple of them are in the audience, I might even throw in a couple technical flubs just to make them happy.
An environment in which people's performances are judged by mistake quantity, I find very contrary to music, because the mistakes they count are almost inevitably only mistakes regarding the pitches and articulations and general vicinity of rhythms on the page. They're very easy to count, I suppose, but they draw a rather poor picture of whether something was played well.
So, really, I could give a crap about the occasional mistake counter, because I think it's a very silly thing to count. It's like someone judging an essay or book solely on grammatical and spelling errors, without giving a second thought to the actual content. True, grammar nazi that I am, I would much rather read an essay with perfect spelling and grammar, and I do much prefer a performance without technical flaws, but I'd rather read Ender's Game with a couple misspellings than a perfectly executed Dick and Jane Watch Paint Dry. And, quite frankly, I hear FAR more of the latter.
Call me weird, but even if I were to sit in on other people in an audition for a spot I really wanted, if someone played the piece really well, I would be happy about it. A bit disappointed about my diminishing prospects, perhaps, but happy that the person I think most likely to get the spot was making good music.
-Alex
www.mostlydifferent.com
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