Author: ohsuzan
Date: 2005-04-22 14:36
VermontJM --
This is a tough call. Like you, I am a little surprised at the tone and character of the responses on this thread.
The question I think we're all trying to get at is, is there a problem here that *you* need to deal with? And if we can agree that there is a problem, what, exactly, is it? And what can or should you do about it?
I think ron b is probably on the right track in saying that , from a musical standpoint, the problem, if there is one, will make itself apparent without anyone else's help, and when or if it does, will present the decision makers with much clearer choices. It is one thing to be personally offended by someone's behavior; it is quite another thing to presume that one's own standards ought to be enforced upon everyone else (which, IMHO, is another of those large societal problems with which we are struggling today).
However, in this case, you may be dealing with a situation which involves behavior which is not just distasteful or personally destructive, but is actually illegal and/or dangerous. Leaving aside the fact of so-called underage drinking (my attitude mirrors David B's), I'd like to know if this individual is driving herself to practice? For me, that's where the rubber hits the road . The fact is, lots of drunks -- especially maintenance drinkers, which this girl may be -- can function remarkably well with a load on, but as a society, we have decided they must do that out of their cars and off the streets.
Of course, anything you alone say to the player in question, or apparently to your director, is likely to not be well-received. It would have more impact if you and the whole rest of the section who is aware of this go to her or the director privately and express your concerns. Alternatively, does the organization itself have any leadership other than the director (like a board, or a band president) with whom you, or the section, can raise your concerns? If she is driving, are you willing or able to call the local law enforcement folks and alert them to a problem driver?
My first husband, a gifted microsurgeon and musician, died at the age of 45 from the effects of alcoholism. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if, instead of suffering in silence, I had called the highway patrol or the local cops or even the hospital authorities every time he went to work drunk (which, basically, was every time he went to work).
I didn't. He died.
Like I said, tough call.
Susan
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