 The Clarinet BBoard
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Author: Ryder
Date: 2008-06-07 16:15
What's the worst clarinet you've ever seen (beat up, smelly, etc...)?
Just yesterday I was handed a case for a Buffet E11.
"Wow, this is light," I said.
"I found part of a clarinet," my director said.
"Part?" I asked.
I opened the case which by the way was falling apart only to find the bottom joint and bell!! ??????????
This E11 was only about 5 years old or so, but every key was pretty much bent. The left pinky B's platic pin was broken in half, the rod for the left C was bent at a 150 degree angle rather than a straight 180. They were all scratched up, there was a thick film on the silver, it looked like someone tried to carve the wood away above the tenon. Oh and the bell was cracked. It was appauling. I'm gonna be pretty pist at the owner of that one on Monday.
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Author: myshineyblackjoy
Date: 2008-06-07 17:16
I have loaned out my plastic vito resotone to many family members for their first year in band. The Last one was the most awful. She drew on my barrel rings to mark where to put her reeds with endelible marker. she masking taped the tenon joints instead of telling me she needed cork. All the trill keys somehow got bent. She doesn't know how. UGH ! I was very happy when she got her own clarinet. I fixed all her boo boos and sold the clarinet to a friend. Last week that neice asked if she could use my Buffet. Guess what my anser was?.....
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Author: GBK
Date: 2008-06-07 17:22
For those of us who have taught in the public schools, there have been so many "worst clarinets" (trumpets, trombones, flutes, saxes, etc...) that it's impossible to pick just one.
After a while, nothing surprises you any more (including one particular trumpet that was run over by the family car and was as flat as a dinner plate)...GBK
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Author: ElBlufer
Date: 2008-06-07 17:55
haha, going off of what GBK said (although it's not a clarinet)....my friend's trumpet was sitting on the field because we were on a water break. someone decided that they wanted to work on backwards marching. The result...something we like to refer back to as "taco trumpet".
My Setup:
R13 Clarinet (Ridenour Lyrique as my backup/marching instrument)
Walter Grabner K11 mouthpiece
Rico Reserve 3.5's
Bonade ligature
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Author: Lelia Loban ★2017
Date: 2008-06-07 18:52
I guess the worst complete clarinet I ever saw (leaving out the cases with jumbles of discarded parts) was an old rubber clarinet that had lain around on a metal table at an outdoor flea market, on a hot summer day. The poor thing, one of the early rubber clarinets made before manufacturers started reinforcing the sections with metal sleeves, had gone banana-shaped. The keys no longer fit squarely onto the holes. The warping had even pulled some of the pivot post screws right out of the sections. All of the tenon bands were either off or completely loose. No pads except the ones lying loose in the case and on the table under the instrument where they'd fallen out during the day. I didn't even attempt to pry the reed, which was moldy-black, from the chipped, warped mouthpiece.
The smell of hot rubber wafted up, along with eau de mildew and other interesting but gross aromas from a clarinet that probably never got swabbed and then sat around in a leaky wrecked case in a damp storage place (basement, I'd guess) for several decades. Insect mausoleum in the case, too, of course. Dead bugs on the table--fell out when the dealer put the clarinet together or other customers picked it up. Glad nobody'd been dumb enough to buy it.
The dealer said something to the effect that he could knock the price down because the clarinet might need some repair work. (Yeah, that and Harry Potter's wand....) I can't remember what the asking price was because, whatever it was, it was about 100 percent too much!
Lelia
http://www.scoreexchange.com/profiles/Lelia_Loban
To hear the audio, click on the "Scorch Plug-In" box above the score.
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Author: stevensfo
Date: 2008-06-07 20:03
- "What's the worst clarinet you've ever seen (beat up, smelly, etc...)?" -
Actually, the very first clarinet I ever bought from Ebay.
A 'Selmer London Student Console', advertised as wooden, but hard rubber.
The MP and barrel went together. What I mean is that the MP and Barrel would only fit each other. The join was smaller than normal.
It was unplayable.
The case was disgusting, smelly, dirty etc...
But the good news is that I used it for practising my repair skills.
Even with new pads, it was rubbish.
Also, I didn't let it put me off Ebay, and have so far had only good experiences and have bought some amazing bargains.
Steve
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Author: blazian
Date: 2008-06-08 02:57
Do metal clarinets count? The only remotely clean and shiny part was the bell because I de-tarnished it and polished just that part. Everywhere was blue/black with tarnish and dusty. All the screws were rusted into the posts, leaving no way to remove the black (once white) pads.
A sax I bought was just as bad. It was the usual brass lacquer, but there were holes worn through into the bore. I guess it corroded too because there was green crusty stuff everywhere too. All the screws were rusted in (again) and the resonators were rusted (doesn't REALLY matter right?). Every key was stuck open or closed. If you touched a spring it snapped.
Otherwise everything is good with a new padjob.
- Martin
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Author: Chris P
Date: 2008-06-08 04:27
Probably an old simple system clarinet that was left assembled and clipped into the lid of an alto sax case. It had obviously been played for decades by the recently deceased owner who may have been a heavy smoker or played in a smoky environment all it's life.
But in all it's life I reckon it had never been taken apart or seen a pullthrough as the joints were fused and the bore was completely encrusted and had the look of 200 grit about it when looking down (I dared not to hold it up to the light to look through it for fear of something falling into my eye). It was probably taken out and played for each gig and then put away at the end still wet.
I managed to get the bore shiny again, but had to dislodge all the crystallised crud from it first which took some doing, but a nylon bristle brush (a valve casing brush) fixed to a metal flute cleaning rod did the trick. What came out from the bore resembled black sugar.
The alto wasn't in great shape either. I also can't remember what ever became of these instruments.
Former oboe finisher
Howarth of London
1998 - 2010
The opinions I express are my own.
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Author: Bill
Date: 2008-06-08 11:10
I got a full-boehm Auguste Buffet (I bought it for the mouthpiece) that, I know this seems impossible, seemed to be softening and decomposing, like a log left out in the rain for a year. It almosot felt like you could pick a piece off of it like a sheet cake.
Still have the mouthpiece, a scroll Lelandais Brad Behn refaced very nicely.
Bill Fogle
Ellsworth, Maine
(formerly Washington, DC)
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Author: EuGeneSee
Date: 2008-06-09 00:29
When our band building was destroyed by the tornado in February, we had many instruments that were found in terrible condition. A story about the disaster in the June edition of the ACB Journal includes a picture of our Band Director, Dell Holt, blowing on the remains of a flattened and mangled trumpet, somewhat like the one Glenn mentioned above.
We did find a complete valve section from a F horn . . . all the rest of the horn was never found, but the valve section was still in perfect working condition!
Eu
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