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Klarinet Archive - Posting 000883.txt from 2004/10

From: "Nicholas Yip" <clarinets21@-----.com>
Subj: RE: [kl] Not sure if this is a joke or something serious -- Man sues Selmer for
Date: Fri, 29 Oct 2004 13:54:45 -0400


There is definitely one way that we will find out. Watch the networks next
Saturday.

Nicholas Yip
Clarinetist and Music Teacher

>From: "dnleeson" <dnleeson@-----.net>
>Reply-To: klarinet@-----.org
>To: "klarinet@-----.org>
>Subject: [kl] Not sure if this is a joke or something serious -- Man sues
>Selmer for a lousy love life
>Date: Fri, 29 Oct 2004 06:10:21 -0700
>
>Broken Newz - Saxophonist Remains Dateless, Sues Instrument
>Manufacturer
>
>Ames, Iowa - Mulford A. Barlow, an accountant for the
>Schneidemann Meat Packing Company and an amateur saxophonist, is
>suing the Selmer Musical Instrument Corporation for an
>undisclosed sum of money for what he is terming "gross violations
>of an implied contract."
>
>Mr. Barlow's attorney, noted civil rights lawyer Ron Kuby,
>alleges in papers filed today with the 2nd Circuit Court of
>Central Iowa that "in their glamorous print advertisements that
>feature beautiful women gazing longingly at men playing the
>saxophone, the Selmer Corporation creates the expectation that
>all one has to do to gain favor with said beautiful women is to
>purchase and learn how to play one of their extremely expensive
>saxophones. After spending more than $6000 on a Selmer Mark VI Eb
>Alto Saxophone and assorted accessories, as well as two years'
>worth of private lessons, my client, Mr. Barlow, is no closer to
>going on his first date than the day he passed his CPA exam."
>
>Saxophonists around the world have rallied to Mr. Barlow's cause.
>David Sanborn and Branford Marsalis have organized "Sax Appeal,"
>a 12-hour live telethon that will raise money to help defray Mr.
>Barlow's legal costs and will air on the Fox and ABC networks
>next Saturday starting at 8pm/7pm Central.
>
>Especially noteworthy is former President Bill Clinton's offer to
>testify on Barlow's behalf as an expert witness on the
>unrealistic sexual expectations placed upon saxophonists. "We're
>all victims of a sax-drenched society," said the former President
>during a meeting of the Renaissance Society at Hedonism II in
>Kingston, Jamaica. "TV, radio, movies, video games. It's nothing
>but sax, sax, sax."
>
>For his part, Mr. Barlow is said to have become disillusioned
>with the saxophone and is giving it up in order to concentrate on
>the accordion. "There are some hot babes who go every week to
>Polka Night at the local Moose
>Lodge," said Mr. Barlow from his bachelor pad in his mother's
>house. "Who knows, I just might get lucky."
>
>Dan Leeson
>DNLeeson@-----.net
>
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