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Klarinet Archive - Posting 000824.txt from 2002/06

From: "Pastor Luby D. Jackson III" <mus_ldj@-----.com>
Subj: Re: [kl] Upgrading
Date: Mon, 24 Jun 2002 15:42:31 -0400

ROFL
----- Original Message -----
From: "David C Kumpf" <dkumpf@-----.com>
Subject: RE: [kl] Upgrading

> Neil Leupold wrote:
> > $75,000 on new clarinet equipment?
> >
> > --- "Pastor Luby D. Jackson III" <mus_ldj@-----.com> wrote:
> > > Please share with me on the diversity and practical use of
> > the C clarinet.
> > > I am about to invest up to $75Gs on new clarinet equipment
> > and I just wanted
> > > to know about this before I venture into this.
>
> Of course, Neil. ;-)
>
> "Announcing the All-New Super Festival RC Prestige Artist Signature
> Model. Combining nanotechnology, our special Unobtanium(R) materials,
> and Old World craftsmanship, this instrument provides a sweet, dark,
> focused, bright, and centered tone unlike any other. (Or unlike itself
> 30 seconds ago, for that matter.) Computer-controlled bore allows
> immediate and continuous variation of bore dimension, tone hole size and
> placement, and undercutting. Heck, it'll even add or remove keys and
> rings, if you ask it real nice.
>
> What's more, every model is signed by your choice of famous-but-deceased
> artist. Using our proprietary Timeline technology (well, we had to name
> it something, so why not the title of a Michael Crichton book), we'll
> send your instrument back to Anton Stadler, Heinrich Baermann, Benny
> Goodman, or one of many other artists for play-testing, certification,
> and signature.
>
> Own a piece of history and the future today!"
>
>
> I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist...
>
>
> Dave Kumpf
> dkumpf@-----.com
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>

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