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Klarinet Archive - Posting 000134.txt from 2002/06

From: Glen Shannon <>
Subj: RE: [kl] OT Consultants was: ALL READ
Date: Tue, 4 Jun 2002 17:20:46 -0400


Your being a consultant reminds me of the scene in Mel Brooks' "the
History of the World, Part I" where in ancient Rome, Bea Arthur was
the clerk at the Vnemployment window (spelled with a V because it was
ancient Rome). Mel Brooks approaches the window, trying to get his
unemployment money. Bea asks, "Occupation?" Mel says "Philosopher".
Bea says "Oh, a bullsh*t artist. Did you bullsh*t today?" "No." "Did
you TRY to bullsh*t today?" "*Yes*"

My partner was a business-solutions-implementation consultant for a
couple years but in banking not software.


>--- David C Kumpf <> wrote:
>> As project director, I would think you would be minding milestones,
>> schedule float, deliverables quality, and defect rates/klines of code,
>> but not queues (except to the extent that a queue object was used to
>> implement the software functionality...)
>> [OK, bad software project management jokes, exit stage left...]
>Our company is so efficient, my primary function is to figure out
>entertaining ways to use up the free slack (which can be accurately
>gauged by how many emails I send to Klarinetland). As for deliver-
>ables quality, I sample the results of business solution implement-
>ations every now & then. W. Edwards Deming would be proud, seeing
>his principles applied in the service industry. :-) "Milestones?
>We don't need no stinking milestones!"
>Do You Yahoo!?
>Yahoo! - Official partner of 2002 FIFA World Cup


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