Klarinet Archive - Posting 000413.txt from 2009/02

From: Fred Jacobowitz <fbjacobo@-----.net>
Subj: Re: [kl] On the lighter side.....a few notes
Date: Mon, 23 Feb 2009 11:01:48 -0500

Yeah, I first read it in that illegal publication, the Banned Leader!

Fred Jacobowitz

CASE CLOSED Musical Instrument Case Repair Service
Kol Haruach Klezmer Band
Ebony and Ivory Duo

You don't get harmony when everybody sings the same note.
~Doug Floyd

On Feb 23, 2009, at 10:54 AM, Michael and Linda Marmer wrote:

> Interesting reed.
>
> Mike
> ----- Original Message ----- From: "David Renaud"
> <manonrivet@-----.ca>
> To: <klarinet@-----.org>
> Sent: Sunday, February 22, 2009 4:40 PM
> Subject: [kl] On the lighter side.....a few notes
>
>
> Three notes walk into a bar...
>
>
>
> A C, an E-flat, and a G go into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry,
> we don't
> serve minors." So the E-flat leaves, and the C and the G have an
> open fifth
> between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished and the G
> is out
> flat.
>
> An F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp
> enough. A
> D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying,
> "Excuse me.
> I'll just be a second."
>
> Then an A comes into the bar, but the bartender is not convinced
> that this
> relative of C is not a minor.
>
> Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and
> exclaims, "Get out now. You're the seventh minor I've found in this
> bar
> tonight."
>
> The E-flat, not easily deflated, comes back to the bar the next
> night in a
> 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender (who used to
> have a
> nice corporate job until his company downsized) says, "You're
> looking sharp
> tonight, come on in! This could be a major development."
>
> This proves to be the case, as the E-flat takes off the suit, and
> everything
> else, and stands there au natural.
>
> Eventually, the C sobers up, and realizes in horror that he's under
> a rest.
> The C is brought to trial, is found guilty of contributing to the
> diminution
> of a minor, and is sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an
> upscale
> correctional facility. On appeal, however, the C is found innocent
> of any
> wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the
> contrary are
> bassless.
>
> The bartender decides, however, that since he's only had tenor so
> patrons,
> and the sopranout in the bathroom, everything has become altoo much
> treble;
> he needs a rest, and closes the bar.
>
> ..courtesy of Erich Wolz.
>
>
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