Klarinet Archive - Posting 000024.txt from 2007/04

From: "Mattera, Alex F." <AMattera@-----.com>
Subj: RE: [kl] Bad joke time
Date: Fri, 06 Apr 2007 13:09:53 -0400

Q: How do you get a professional musician off your doorstep?

A: Pay him for the pizza.

-----Original Message-----
From: Curtis Bennett [mailto:curtis.bennett@-----.com]=20
Sent: Friday, April 06, 2007 12:54 PM
To: klarinet@-----.org
Subject: Re: [kl] Bad joke time

Q. What's the difference between a drummer and a mutual bond.

A. One will eventually mature and earn money.

On 4/6/07, Rommel John Miller <RommelJMiller@-----.net> wrote:
> Q: What do you call a beautiful woman on a Trombonist's arm?
>
> A: A tattoo.
>
> Of course, that could apply to me as well, and I am just a lowly=20
> clarinetist, pianist and saxophonist wannabe.
>
> Rommel John Miller
> 308 Dale Avenue
> Baltimore, MD 21206-1219
> 410-668-4784
> 410-967-8994
> DoctorX@-----.net
> RommelJMiller@-----.net
>
> Clarinetist, Saxiphonist and Pianist
> Actor and Magician
> Contact me for more information
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Tom Puwalski [mailto:tski1128@-----.com]
> Sent: Friday, April 06, 2007 9:20 AM
> To: klarinet@-----.org
> Subject: Re: [kl] Bad joke time
>
> How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?
> One and the world revolves around her
> On Apr 6, 2007, at 9:00 AM, Ted wrote:
>
> > From Ted Casher:
> >
> > Q. How many concert clarinet players does it take to change a=20
> > lightbulb?
> >
> > A. It only takes one, but he has to go thru a whole box before he=20
> > finds one he likes!
> >
> > .....and going further.....
> >
> > Q. How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a=20
> > lightbulb?
> >
> > A. Two. One to change the bulb, and the other to pull the ladder=20
> > out from under him!
> >
> > ....gets worse.....
> >
> > Q. How many Berklee guitar players does it take to change a light=20
> > bulb?
> >
> > A. Six. One to change the bulb, and five others to stand around=20
> > saying; "I can do that......better!"
> >
> > Q. How many Berklee electric bass players does it take to change a=20
> > light bulb?
> >
> > A. None. The keyboard player can do it with his left hand!
> >
> > .......even worse.....
> >
> > Q. How many Berklee drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
> >
> > A. None. They have a machine that can do it!
> >
> > LOL---happy holiday! (politically correct salutation!) May all our

> > reeds be running right! Cheers, Ted Casher
> > ----- Original Message ----- From: "Rommel John Miller"=20
> > <RommelJMiller@-----.net>
> > To: <klarinet@-----.org>
> > Sent: Friday, April 06, 2007 1:26 AM
> > Subject: [kl] Bad joke time
> >
> >
> >> I was just at my local musicians union website, and I hit on the=20
> >> joke button and kept hitting it until a clarinet joke came around,=20
> >> and what a doozie it
> >> was, but I guess it could apply to an oboist or a flutist as well.
> >>
> >> It might bother some of you, but I beg you, have an open mind and=20
> >> be willing to laugh, it tickled my funny bone.
> >>
> >> Why do clarinetists leave their cases on the dashboard?
> >>
> >> So they can park in the handicapped zones.
> >>
> >> And some can say "bad" or "poor" taste, but I am a 100% service=20
> >> connected DISABLED veteran with BI-POLAR DISORDER and I have=20
> >> learned to accept and
> >> even laugh at my idiotic brand of insanity, and I don't abuse my
> >> privilege
> >> to use the handicapped parking zone, I just thought the hackneyed
> >> twist on a
> >> school yard style taunt directed at us meek, mild and diminutive
> >> clarinet
> >> playing types was rib-tickling.
> >>
> >> If you feel you have to blame anyone direct your ire at=20
> >> www.musiciansunion.org and not me, okay?
> >>
> >> Peace,
> >>
> >> Rommel John Miller
> >> 308 Dale Avenue
> >> Baltimore, MD 21206-1219
> >> 410-668-4784
> >> 410-967-8994
> >> DoctorX@-----.net
> >> RommelJMiller@-----.net
> >>
> >> Clarinetist, Saxiphonist and Pianist
> >> Actor and Magician
> >> Contact me for more information
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> ------------------------------------------------------------------
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> >> a list of commands: email klarinet-help@-----.org For help:=20
> >> email klarinet-owner@-----.org
> >
> >
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> >
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--=20
Curtis Bennett

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