Klarinet Archive - Posting 001050.txt from 2004/03

From: "Dee D. Flint" <deehays@-----.net>
Subj: Re: [kl] foul language
Date: Wed, 17 Mar 2004 21:58:17 -0500


----- Original Message -----
From: "Sue Raycraft" <raycraft@-----.com>
To: <klarinet@-----.org>
Sent: Wednesday, March 17, 2004 9:22 PM
Subject: Re: [kl] foul language

> > The use of profanity, foul language etc obscures the meaning as they are
> > unnecessary words. The listener has to wait, if you will, until the
> speaker
> > gets past such words to the heart of the matter. Then of course there
is
> > the problem that if there are too many unnecessary words in the
> discussion,
> > foul or not, the listener simply tunes out.
> >
> > How well do you listen to the person that goes "..uh..um" between
phrases
> or
> > every other word? You tune out.
>
>
> Yes, there is an art to carrying on a conversation, but there is also
> an art to being a good listener. I would think that a big part of
> being a good listener would be to exercise patience, even if the
> speaker is using "too many" or "unnecessary" words.
>
> If you tune out, that simply means you have already decided in your
> mind that what the other person has to say is not worth hearing.
>
> Sue

No it is not a determination that what they have to say is not worth
hearing. Instead it is a determination that too much time and effort is
being expended to extract the intended message. People who make a living
speaking know this and work very hard to insure that there audience is
intrigued by their message and its delivery. They know that there is a
limit to the listener's patience.

If it is an emergency situation, I will focus on the message despite its
delivery and the amount of effort required to extract the necessary
information. On the other hand, if someone is describing a new restaurant
they have visited and every other word is devoid of content (i.e. "...uh
um", or vulgarity etc), it's not worth the effort to extract the message.

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