Klarinet Archive - Posting 000418.txt from 2004/02

From: "Lelia Loban" <lelialoban@-----.net>
Subj: [kl] Investigating new instruments with no $
Date: Wed, 25 Feb 2004 14:53:38 -0500

Describing a very rude customer, Ginger Hill wrote,
>Thank God I was out of town when she came back
>or I would have had some words for her- which my
>manager backed me up on 100%.
[snip]
>Besides, from now on anyone who comes in with the
>"I'm better than you because I'm European" attitude
>will be referred directly to my manager.

I'll bet that a lot of Europeans would have been mortified, if they'd heard
that woman carrying on the way she did. I'll also bet that, when she's in
Europe and dealing with people her own age, she finds some other excuse to
act high-and-mighty. Glad to hear that your manager backs you up, but even
gladder that you managed to stifle the impulse to blast this rude customer
to her face. If I were your manager, I would have been pleased that you
took the responsibility of dealing with a difficult transaction with
dignity and a professional attitude, by treating this unpleasant character
with courtesy instead of by descending to her low level. Also, if you'd
blown up at her, she could go home and perpetuate the stereotype she has
about Americans, by complaining about how those horrible American
shopkeepers treat customers. You did your country a favor by not giving
ammunition to a bigot.

You set a good example for the other employees and for that woman and any
other customers who may have overheard. A lot of more experienced
employees might have "lost it" instead of showing your self-control. I
don't blame you for being angry and for being tempted to say a word or ten
to that woman if she comes back and gives you that kind of guff again, but
in the long run, it's more satisfying not to give in to those impulses.
(Voice of experience here: I don't always keep my own temper, but usually
regret losing it.) You *proved* you were more civilized than she was, and
deep down, I'll bet she knows it and feels some (well-deserved) shame, no
matter how snooty she acts. Her arrogance is really a sign of insecurity.
Genuinely superior people don't have to strut around announcing their
superiority.

Lelia Loban
E-mail: lelialoban@-----.net
Web site (original music scores as audio or print-out):
http://members.sibeliusmusic.com/LeliaLoban

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