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Klarinet Archive - Posting 000080.txt from 2003/12
From: "Helen Heath" <helen_heath@-----.com>
Subj: [kl] Mathematics for Musicians
Date: Wed, 3 Dec 2003 09:17:37 -0500
Thought this might amuse, and it's even relevant to the clarinet (see numbe=
r one)! :)
Mathematics for Musicians=20
(From conductor Gary Berkson, Stockholm)=20
1. Wilma is tired of paying for clarinet reeds. If she adopts a policy of =
playing only on rejected reeds from her colleagues will she be able to re=
tire on the money she has saved if she invests it in mutual bonds, yieldi=
ng 8.7%, before she is fired from her job? If not, calculate the probabil=
ity of her ever working in a professional symphony orchestra again.=20
2. Jethro has been playing the double bass in a symphony orchestra for twe=
lve years, three months and seven days. Each day, his inclination to prac=
tice decreases by the equation:
(Total days in the orchestra) x .000976
Assuming he stopped practicing altogether four years, six months and three =
days ago, how long will it be before he is completely unable to play the =
double bass?=20
3. Wilma plays in the second violin section, but specializes in making dis=
paraging remarks about conductors and other musicians. The probability of=
her making a negative comment about any given musician is 4 chances in 7=
, and for conductors is 16 chances in 17. If there are 103 musicians in t=
he orchestra and the orchestra sees 26 different conductors a year, how m=
any negative comments does Wilma make in a two-year period? How does this=
change if five of the musicians are also conductors? What if six of the =
conductors are also musicians?=20
4. Horace is the General Manager of an important symphony orchestra. He tr=
ies to hear at least four concerts a year. Assuming that at each concert =
the orchestra plays a minimum of three pieces per concert, what are the c=
hances that Horace can avoid hearing a single work by Mozart, Beethoven o=
r Brahms in the next ten years?=20
5. Betty plays in the viola section. Despite her best efforts she is unabl=
e to play with the rest of the orchestra and, on average, plays .3528 sec=
onds behind the rest of the viola section, which is already .16485 second=
s behind the rest of the orchestra. If the orchestra is moving into a new=
concert hall with a reverberation time of 2.7 seconds, will she be able =
to continue playing this way undetected?
6. Ralph loves to drink coffee. Each week he drinks three more cups of cof=
fee than Harold, who drinks exactly one third the amount that the entire =
brass section consumes in beer. How much longer is Ralph going to live?
7. Rosemary is unable to play in keys with more than three sharps or flats=
without making an inordinate number of mistakes. Because her colleagues =
in the cello section are also struggling in these passages she has so far=
been able to escape detection. What is the total number of hours they wo=
uld all have to practice to play the complete works of Richard Strauss?
=3D*=3D
There are two means of relief from the miseries of life: music and cats.
---Albert Schweitzer
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