Klarinet Archive - Posting 000305.txt from 2003/06

From: Gil Guerrero <gilster@-----.com>
Subj: [kl] Angels on a pin was Key Characters...
Date: Tue, 10 Jun 2003 15:55:33 -0400

> >can't we just talk about how many angels can fit on the head of a
>pin? The answer being, of course, three.
>
>How you figure?

Under a grant from the National Science Foundation, theologians from
each religion were asked to submit standardized Angels for the
purposes of this exercise. It was believed that this selection
methodology would encourage each to submit their "best" and most
uniform angels to minimize any characterization that the experiment
was conducted with a Judeo-Christian bias. Each Angel was assigned a
number based on the order in which the Angels names were provided by
the respective religion.

Standardized tailor's straight pins were procured from the NIST,
along with standardized peanut butter samples to allow the testers to
snack during the experiment. They stated that the peanut butter was
expensive, didn't look like much, but it sure was "peanutty," which
was later confirmed by gas chromatography.

Random numbers were generated using background radio frequency noise
from SETI. A theologic lottery was used to select which religions
would be used for the 3-outta-5 examination. The random numbers were
used to select the Angels for the purposes of the experiment.

Additional RNs were generated for purposes of selecting an
appropriate song for said Angels to dance to. The song selected was
The Gratefuld Dead's "Sugar Magnolia" from a performance on 04-08-72
at Wembley Empire Pool, London, England. Deadheads who were consulted
were said to say that it was "Pretty close to heaven!"

Said Angels were told to fly close to the head of the pin, and when
Bobby sings "Sugar Magnolia, blossoms blooming..." to alight on the
head of the pin.

For the purposes of this experiment, being "standing" was defined by
the longitudinal angular measurement of the luminous body of the
angel, via spectrophotometer, being confirmed within 75 and 115
degrees (+/- 20 seconds) perpendicular to the platform formed by the
pin head. Those angels still erect on the head of the pin when Bobby
sings "Sunshine Daydream..." were considered to be "standing" without
divine or earthly intervention. The number three was detected the
most times, in this highly controlled environment.

When asked to comment about the nature of musical key personality,
each Angel declined, stating that there was no way they were going to
get sucked into that one if Dan Leeson was listening.

>Have a Nice Day!!
> Wendy :)

Wendy, you have a great day too! LOL!
--
Gil Guerrero
gilster@-----.com

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