Klarinet Archive - Posting 000546.txt from 2003/05

From: "Resurgere Jones" <resurgereweb@-----.com>
Subj: RE: [kl] Transposition
Date: Thu, 22 May 2003 11:56:17 -0400

Rebecca

If you will kindly send me an itemized list of your expenses in connection
with my recent humor, I will send you something of like value. I don't like
sending cash or anything with any market value through the mail - will you
take an Alto clarinet?*
>
>I spent the whole day yesterday trying to be funny at your expense. I don't
>quite understand why you are insisting to take up for me.

* Reference to Alto Clarinet is not intended to offend any students of the
instrument. The author of this post played Alto Clarinet his freshmen year
in h.s. concert band (but never owned one of his own. Or inhaled). Further,
author of this post recognizes that his opinions are worthless because he is
not an internationally recognized recording artist, and certifies that his
pockets are rodent-free. Alto Clarinet offer intended as facetious, as
author of post still does not own an Alto Clarinet. Humor is implicit in the
idea, again not intended to offend anyone, that an Alto Clarinet has no
market value and would not be stolen. Author of post takes no responsibility
for any other member of Klarinet list leaving Alto Clarinets they may happen
to own or be in control of unattended because of implication, intended for
humorous purposes only, that no one would steal an Alto Clarinet. In fact,
Alto Clarinets may have been stolen in transit in U.S. Mail in the past.
Author of post does not imply any fault on the part of the U.S. Mail
service. Author of post can also take a joke about his** instruments. The
Klarinet list is not a high school chat room. Never use Windex(R) on a
clarinet reed. Tar is not a plaything.

** i.e. Bari Sax: Q:What's the difference between a Bari Sax and a Chainsaw?
A***:People get upset if you borrow a chainsaw and don't return it.

*** Alternate answers for above joke:
-- vibrato.
-- you can tune a chainsaw.

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