Klarinet Archive - Posting 000279.txt from 2003/03

From: "Trish Mendenhall" <trishm@-----.com>
Subj: RE: [kl] Better Rebecca
Date: Thu, 6 Mar 2003 18:32:13 -0500

> In my view, it does her a disservice to tell her that she=20
> shouldn't feel those feelings, if she feels them. Of course,=20
> I do know that doing her a disservice was very far from=20
> anybody's intention. But my point is, Rebecca's *trying not=20
> to feel them* might stop her discovering where they come=20
> from, and thus mastering them.

It's not a matter of not feeling those feelings. They can be very useful =
-
put in perspective, that frustration and anger can be very real =
motivating
factors. I regularly feel that way when I listen to other =
instrumentalists,
but as you say:
=20
> Even if she never is entirely free of those feelings, "I'm=20
> angry I can't do that!" isn't very far away from, "I'm damned=20
> well going to practise that bit until I *can*!"

The point is to *use* the feelings, not to let them use you. Get angry, =
but
don't get overwhelmed - you can use the energy. Figure out what you need =
to
do to be able to say to yourself "I do that at LEAST as well". And, =
without
using it as a crutch or justification, remind yourself of the things you
already do well, or maybe of things you do better. Having too negative =
a
view of yourself is as damaging as having too positive a view - neither
serves you well in the real world.

When I was in high school, we realized very quickly how much psychology
comes in to play. I was first chair in my section, not so much because =
I
was always the best, but because I stopped letting mind games(both from
others and from myself)work on me as easily. We had chair tests =
regularly
within sections - usually some particularly difficult passage in a piece =
we
were doing, or some exercise or etude. When the next chair test was a =
quick
and technically challenging excerpt, the second chair and I would use =
the
upcoming chair test piece in our warmups, playing as fast as we could
without stopping. Tone wasn't necessarily the best, and if you listened
closely, we weren't 100% accurate, but we were quick. The third chair
clarinetist focused on how quickly we played, not noticing the little
inaccuracies. When it came time to do chair tests, the second chair and =
I
would settle back into a more workable pace, not quite as quick, and =
with
all the little nuances covered that we could, tone, technique, dynamics. =
The
third chair had himself so wound up that he would inevitably attempt the
piece faster than he had practiced, and faster than was appropriate, =
getting
himself finger-and-tongue tied in the process. Now, this clarinetist was =
a
fine instrumentalist, and had plenty of talent and skill. I freely =
admitted
he was better than I in some areas, and could quite possibly have taken
first chair from me a time or two. But he wasn't able to use that to his
advantage because he was too busy looking at what he perceived as =
something
he couldn't do as well.

The moral of the story is - be aware of your strengths, while working to
improve in your weak areas.=20

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