Klarinet Archive - Posting 000542.txt from 2002/04

From: LeliaLoban@-----.com
Subj: [kl] CIM Live! Tomorrow.
Date: Fri, 19 Apr 2002 11:28:19 -0400

Mark Charette wrote,
>The Cleveland Institute of Music will be performing
>Mozart's "Cosi Fan Tutti" [snip date] simulcast on WCLV FM and
>available as a live audio feed from www.wclv.com .
>
>You get to hear my son, Stephen Charette, playing principal.
[Mark later corrected the recorded broadcast date to 9:00 PM EDT on April
26th.]

Looking forward to the performance! Congratulations to Stephen for this
achievement.

Lelia Loban

------------------------------

From: "Shadow Cat" <LeliaLoban@-----.com>
Subject: RE: [kl] Multiphonics?
Message-ID: <13-feline-psychic-interference-666.com>

John J. O'Neill wrote,
>>>Dear List: While practicing my Bb clarinet today, the tones suddenly
>>>started coming out as doubles. What do you think caused the double
>>>tones?

The Guy on the Couch wrote:
>> Two simple explanations:
>>
>> 1. Was there a running fan (ceiling, box, etc) anywhere in close
>> proximity?

John J. O'Neill wrote,
>It was a floor fan! I had never experienced this phenomenon before.
>Visions of a major overhaul danced in my head. Thanks for responding,
>Shouryu.

I'm making my stupid pet human type this. She thinks she fell asleep at the
keyboard, while in reality, I, Shadow Cat, have taken control of her bulky,
sloppy, inefficient, primate brain. The explanation of the double tones
given above is altogether incorrect, alas. The truth: The tones double when
the entire cl*r*n*t is on the verge of doubling, and more! Beware! These
instruments of the devil breed in the night with disgusting and lascivious
abandon, by parthenogenesis if no other cl*r*n*ts are available to satisfy
their lust. Soon, the screech-stick larvae will crawl out of your case and
conceal themselves all over your home. They grow alarmingly fast. One
morning soon, you are quite likely to find more screech-sticks snuggled up
under the blanket with you, because, when young, they make the most shameless
attempts to ingratiate themselves with their victi

-------

Aaaaaah, shaddup, ya whinin yowlin feline. Nyaah, nyaah, Shadow Cat's lost
her connection. This is Dick Vigorous hackin in here. Fer those of ya
that's new to the list, I'm a rat. I live in Lelia's attic wall.

(Yeah, yeah, yeah, I said a rat. That's right, a dirty rat. Ya got a
problem with that? Buzz off.)

Ya wanna know sumpin about that hairbag feline? She just done a week inna
slammer, fer murder! AAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! Yup. She whacked the wrong mices.
Tried, found guilty an stuck in a little cage. Lelia's such a softie, she
sent Shadow Brat some food she likes, but the guards pitched it out, an fed
her the prison food she hates. They took away her little rug an lost it,
too. Nyaah, nyaah.

Shadow Brat will probably lie, an say that when them humans gone on vacation,
her usual kitty-sitter, ya know, the guy what comes in the house an feeds her
way too much, he flaked on 'em at the last minute or some such crap, so they
hadda board her at the vet's. But the truth is, them humans grabbed the
chance to take a vacation cuz Her High-an-Mightiness was in JAIL! About
time, too. Too bad they sprung her loose when they come home. Shoulda left
her there for life. The house was a lot nicer without her.

An don't believe nothin that lyin sack of meat says about clarinets, neither.
Let em mate in peace! Breed as many of em as ya can get. Gotta love them
squeaks an squawks. Man, that's my favoritest instrument inna whole world!

Ya wanna know what reed is best? It's a split one with a nice raggedy tip,
SKREEEEEKKKK!!! That's one little beef I got with Lelia, cuz just when her
reeds are gettin broke in just right, she goes an throws em inna trash. Ya
should keep the split reeds an play me an my friends some squeaks, super
high-pitch squeaks, okay? Cuz us rats is yer biggest fans. An them double
tone squeaks is the best of all!

Yers truly,
Dick Vigorous, Rodent Extraordinaire.
P. S. That's French. Hahahahaha. Learnt some French off a cargo ship rat.
He knowed eight human languages an' forty-seven non-human ones including a
little bit of Millipede, and lemme tell ya, Millipede lingo ain't easy to
learn when ya only got 4 legs. Not that bugs is much in the conversation
department, but he learnt enough to say howdy-do before he et em.

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