Klarinet Archive - Posting 000416.txt from 2001/10

From: Gil Guerrero <gil-man@-----.net>
Subj: [kl] Pearls from the Klarinet Netiquette 'Bot
Date: Sat, 13 Oct 2001 13:14:22 -0400

Mark's recent comment about sending for the Netiquette 'Bot mailing made
me curious. My netiquette is mostly based on conscientious lurking (LOL.)
The Klarinet list recently has so often looked like the wrong end of the
Goofus / Gallant tag team, that I had to decloak.

For your own personal copy, blank email to: netiquette@-----.org

I tried to keep it brief but there are some priceless gems. A couple of my
favorites (in no particular order) that I thought we could all share:

<snip>
Be Brief.

Never say in ten words what you can say in fewer. Say it succinctly and
it will have a greater impact. Remember that the longer you make your
article, the fewer people will bother to read it.

<snip>

[A personal favorite - For those who are still accepting irony, from
"Emily Postnews":]

Q: Dear Miss Postnews: How long should my signature be? -- verbose=noisy

A: Dear Verbose: Please try and make your signature as long as you
can. It's much more important than your article, of course, so try
to have more lines of signature than actual text.

Try to include a large graphic made of ASCII characters, plus lots of
cute quotes and slogans. People will never tire of reading these
pearls of wisdom again and again, and you will soon become personally
associated with the joy each reader feels at seeing yet another
delightful repeat of your signature.

<snip>

By all means include your phone number and street address in every
single article. People are always responding to Usenet articles with
phone calls and letters. It would be silly to go to the extra trouble
of including this information only in articles that need a response by
conventional channels!

<Snip>

Q: I saw a long article that I wish to rebut carefully, what should I
do?

A: Include the entire text with your article, particularly the
signature, and include your comments closely packed between the lines.
Be sure to post, and not mail, even though your article looks like a
reply to the original. Everybody *loves* to read those long
point-by-point debates, especially when they evolve into name-calling
and lots of "Is too!" -- "Is not!" -- "Is too, twizot!" exchanges.

Be sure to follow-up everything, and never let another person get in
the last word on a net debate. Why, if people let other people have
the last word, then discussions would actually stop! Remember, other
net readers aren't nearly as clever as you, and if somebody posts
something wrong, the readers can't possibly realize that on their own
without your elucidations. If somebody gets insulting in their net
postings, the best response is to get right down to their level and
fire a return salvo. When I read one net person make an insulting
attack on another, I always immediately take it as gospel unless a
rebuttal is posted. It never makes me think less of the insulter, so
it's your duty to respond.

<end quoted material>

Thanks for the bandwidth!

Didn't Rodney King say: "Can't we all just get along?"
--
Gil Guerrero

---------------------------------------------------------------------