Klarinet Archive - Posting 000054.txt from 2001/06

From: Bilwright@-----.net (William Wright)
Subj: [kl] Tuning humor
Date: Sat, 2 Jun 2001 00:31:00 -0400

I copied this (probably not verbatim) from a piece of paper which did
not include the author's name or book's title. It was (I believe) part
of a chapter about how to tune:

===============================

Can you recognize yourself?

1. The player and pianist walk out on the stage. The pianist plays
A, which is a signal for the player to blot out the note he has heard by
performing a few scales or loud notes. The player makes no adjustment
to his instrument. He coughs. He adjusts his music and his tie. He
starts to play.

2. He plays a staccatissimo pianissimo A, peers down his instrument
like a telescope as if he is Vasco de Gama sighting land, nods
confidently to the pianist, and begins.

3. As above, but this is a more experienced player. He has observed
what professionals do, and he imitates their method of warming up.
Offstage can be heard the final variation of Carnival of Tunis. He
walks on, the pianist plays an A, the player minutely examines a part of
the mechanism on his instrument amd nods to the pianist. Very
impressive. Until he begins the first phrase.

(probably you can one of the 'details' that my teacher is emphasizing at
lessons right now <smile>)

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