Klarinet Archive - Posting 000296.txt from 2001/02

From: Bilwright@-----.net (William Wright)
Subj: [kl] Do you need an audience?
Date: Fri, 9 Feb 2001 00:33:42 -0500

I dislike (detest) telemarketing because it's a personal intrusion
against which there is no practical defense, and it can do real harm
such as forcing a sick or handicapped person to make an unnecessary trip
across the room, etc. Or a telemarketing call may keep my line busy
just when Ed McMahan is trying to give me $10 million.

....but I've discovered that there _*is*_ one potential use for
telemarketing calls. When I ask telemarketers to listen while I play,
so far none of them have hung up.
I think it's part of the basic telemarketing strategy: if the
victim.... oops, I mean "potential customer" will respond in any way
whatsoever, don't hang up.
I've played a full page of music to several of them now, and I
always end with a gut-wrenching, tooth-grinding, eyeball-twisting
purposeful 'blooper'. When I pick up the phone afterwards, they're
still there and ready with a flattering comment of some sort.

So if you need a captive audience, just ask the next telemarketer
to listen. Most likely, he or she will.

....yes, I think I need to learn the song that Kermit sang about
"I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts".... that would be appropriate,
don't you think?

Cheers,
Bill

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