Klarinet Archive - Posting 001166.txt from 2000/12

From: rgarrett@-----.edu
Subj: Re: [kl] Re: Super-Agreeables (was Aggressive Primates)
Date: Thu, 21 Dec 2000 22:10:19 -0500

Super Agreeables and Other Wonderfully Nice People, an excerpt from "Coping
With Difficult People" by Robert M. Bramson, Ph.D., published by Dell
Publishing Group, Inc.

How could anyone so wonderful, friendly and compliant ever be a problem to
anyone? People like this always have a smile a friendly word for
you. Best of all, they seem so responsive. Whatever you want from them,
you get. What neat, sweet people, UNTIL you need some action: that order
form signed, your raise approved in writing, an honest and tough-minded
discussion of a problem. How do you fight someone who always agrees with
you? Without a clear path to your goal, without concrete obstacles to
hurdle, what is there left but to feel your blood pressure rise as you
become more and more mired in super-agreeableness?

Super-Agreeables always tell you things that are satisfying to hear. They
are Difficult People precisely because the leave you believing they are in
agreement with your plans, only to let you down. Super-Agreeables are
outgoing people, sociable, and personal with others in a way that makes for
friendly interactions.

Super-Agreeables often use humor as a way to ease a conversation. The
humor may have a joshing quality, but it's chiefly intended as an
expression of intimacy rather than as a dig. "Hi, Mary! Still leaving the
family to fend for itself, I see. I'm so glad you could make the
meeting." Sometimes, however, Super-Agreeables do use humor as a way of
sending serious messages.

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Unsubscribe from Klarinet, e-mail: klarinet-unsubscribe@-----.org
Subscribe to the Digest: klarinet-digest-subscribe@-----.org
Additional commands: klarinet-help@-----.org
Other problems: klarinet-owner@-----.org