Klarinet Archive - Posting 000149.txt from 2000/05

From: Daniel Leeson <leeson0@-----.net>
Subj: Re: [kl] Catalog blurbs was......Re: [kl] Re: [Re: [kl] Early Beethoven,
Date: Wed, 3 May 2000 18:26:18 -0400

I might not be able to do better but I am fairly sure I could not do
worse.

Dan

GrabnerWG@-----.com wrote:
>
> In a message dated 5/1/00 4:17:44 PM Central Daylight Time,
> leeson0@-----.net writes:
>
> << To speak of an
> instrument that they first came out with relatively few years ago and
> which, prior to that time, had not been heard for almost 200 years as
> having a "normally weaker register" is so marketing, that it is blatant
> sham. >>
>
> I suggest a 10 year moratorium, where ALL clarinet ad copy is written by Dan
> Leeson.....
>
> What do you say Dan? With this ONE opportunity, you could banish the word
> d**k from the clarinet vocabulary.
>
> (Who wants a dark tone anyway?....."What did you think of the concert
> dear???" "Oh, it was DARK"............."I loved that violinists TONE....it
> was so DARK!!!!!!......Try that one sometime.)
>
> WG wants to write the.mouthpiece blurbs........(Wicked glee!!!!!!!!!!!)
>
> "The XYZ Famous Dead Clarinetist Mouthpiece comes in basic black, somewhat
> shiny, but will IMMEDIATELY become permanently SCRATCHED the first time you
> use it. It play wil a dull, muffled tone, due to the fact that the table is
> warped in ALL dimensions simultaneously - this in itself a nearly miraculous
> feat of Engineering.
>
> The dramatic SQUEAKS produced by the XYZ FDC Mouthpiece are caused by an
> uneven facing aggravated by warped side rails which have escaped our
> non-existant quality control."
>
> "Try the XYZ Famous Dead Clarinetist Mouthpiece......you'll even play better
> than him.....Because he's DEAD!!!!!!"
>
> $70 at all fine music centers!
>
> WG....
> Oh my...........how cynical
>
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--
***************************
** Dan Leeson **
** leeson0@-----.net **
***************************

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