Klarinet Archive - Posting 001751.txt from 1998/04

From: fcoene@-----.org
Subj: [kl] JOKES
Date: Thu, 30 Apr 1998 11:52:38 -0400

How is lightning like a violist's fingers?
Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

How do you get a viola section to play spiccato?
Write a whole note with "solo" above it.

How can you tell when a violist is playing out of tune?
The bow is moving.

Why is a viola solo like a bomb?
By the time you hear it, it's too late to do anything about it.

What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is happy when the case is closed.

What is the range of a Viola?
As far as you can kick it.

Frederik

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