Klarinet Archive - Posting 000114.txt from 1997/10

From: avrahm galper <agalper@-----.com>
Subj: follow the beat
Date: Sat, 4 Oct 1997 22:49:38 -0400

Follow the beat
See what happens when you don't practice. I was away for two weeks and
I missed getting the beginning of the story in the posting. Here it is:

Follow the beat!

Give someone a little stick called baton and he turns into a different
person.

I remember one of our string players conducted a small group in a high
school.
This was sponsored by the Musician's trust Fund.
During rehearsal, some of the string players passed a few words among
themselves.
The conductor turned to them "WILL YOU GUYS SHUT UP!"

C'mon Mack, we're friends, what's this?

A prominent psychoanalyst, Dr.Bergler, explains: when infants are small,
they get a feeling of authority. They're hungry--they get fed, they're
wet, they get changed.
It's the feeling of what he calls MEGOLAMANIA, the power to order, to
rule.
When the infants get older, lets say 4-5, rules and regulations are laid
down, you can't do this or that.
This is a contradiction of their previous power. They develop some sort
of neurosis.

The only people who retain this megalomania are CONDUCTORS!
That explains the tantrums, the stamping of feet on the podium, etc. if
things don't go the way they want.

Craig Ruff asked what happened afterwards.
We were on a High School stage. It was higher than the audience. The
players in the front, the strings, made the best of their composure but
we wind players in the back, ducked behind the music stands and laughed
our heads off.
Avrahm Galper