Klarinet Archive - Posting 000278.txt from 1995/04

From: Jennifer Adams <jadams@-----.AU>
Subj: Re: Different castrati.
Date: Sun, 16 Apr 1995 20:57:59 -0400

>
> I think it would be possible for the castrato to have an orgasm by doing the
> following:
>
> Assemble his clarinet, sans reed and ligature.
> Stick it up his butt.
>
> Be sure to let us ALL know if this works! Enjoy!
>

Well, actually if you want to take the historical perspective of castrati
into account, they were in great demand as lovers to the ladies of the
court as they had three definite advantages over the average bloke;
1-They couldn't get the woman in question pregnant.
2-They had very attractive, boyish faces, (i.e., sans beard and
coarsening of the features due to steroidal and hormonal stimuli).
3-They had incredible staying power during intercourse as being
deprived of one's testes makes ejaculation and then orgasm difficult.
HOWEVER, historical reports of such activity bear testimony to the fact
that ejaculation of a sort did occur, the substance discharged being
similar to what we commonly refer to as "pre-ejaculatory fluid" and the
release of this fluid facilitated orgasm.
So, you see, there is no need to damage one's clarinet in order to
achieve sexual fullfilment.
Please KLARINETTISTS, find another almost unrelated subject, as this
one has just about died a natural death.

Cheers, Iffa Jane. jadams@-----.au

   
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