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Doublereed Archive - Posting 000041.txt from 2005/01
From: "Sarah Cordish" <cordish@-----.il>
Subj: Re: [DR-L] Re: Why do musicians hate themselves??
Date: Mon, 10 Jan 2005 02:47:06 -0500
I read all these posts. One thought came to mind: In all my years of music
schooling, lessons have consisted of the instructor/teacher listening to me
play and saying, "This is wrong. This is also wrong. This is no good."..on
and on. It is a wonder I kept going. That is the way I was taught; and I
am probably not the only one.
So, when I play I naturally think about what is wrong. And that is how
musicians learn to hate themselves.
Sarah
----- Original Message -----
From: "Lawrence Rhodes" <bassoon@-----.net>
To: <doublereed@-----.org>
Sent: Monday, January 10, 2005 6:50 AM
Subject: [DR-L] Re: Why do musicians hate themselves??
> As young professionals it is time to decide what direction to take with
your
> careers. What is happening with your friend is part of that. Be
> supportive, but your friend has to decide if the feelings he is getting
are
> worth the trouble. We all certainly have been frustrated by ourselves and
> our instruments from time to time. It is a Darwin thing, but it is not
the
> survival of the best just the most persistent. If you are persistent and
> have good maners you will succeed. I saw a bassoonist hit his head
against
> a wall after a concert. That was 20 years ago. He is still playing. I
am
> sure your friend has the same feelings. Just expressing it differently.
> Lawrence Rhodes......
>
>
> > Date: Sun, 9 Jan 2005 15:10:26 -0500
> > To: <doublereed@-----.org>
> > From: "Frank Jordan" <frank@-----.com>
> > Subject: Why do musicians hate themselves??
> > Message-ID:
> > <6B96955D7441E1438E21BCFC69A57B2906D5BA@-----.com>
> >
> > =20
> > Hi all,
> >
> > Last night, my roommate (a very talented clarinetist) and I
> > participated in a chamber concert for our local Philharmonic, performing
> > the Richard Strauss Suite in Bb for 13 winds. The group was a mixture
> > of semi professional and purely amateur performers, and overall went
> > very well (certainly one of the high points of the program)
> >
> > The problem is that, when the concert was over, and we were all in the
> > reception, my roommate came to me almost in tears telling me he ruined
> > the whole performance, that he wanted to quit the clarinet, etc. Turns
> > out his reed was slightly misaligned, and he couldn't get the full tone
> > he wanted in the first movement. Keep in mind, the conductor, members
> > of the audience are coming up to us and congratulating us, telling us
> > how wonderful the concert was, telling us things they liked about the
> > performance. I knew the performance had some glitches, and in my
> > college or early "pro" days I would have probably been beating myself up
> > for the small mistakes ("Oh my God, I can't believe I cracked that A in
> > the fourth movement! I am worthless!!!"). I was thinking about past
> > performances (my roomie and I both are involved in a woodwind quintet
> > and gig together a lot) and was shocked to realize I had NEVER heard
> > anything positive from him after a performance. He actually shuns
> > praise... it makes him feel uncomfortable. In some ways, I empathize, I
> > can be the same way sometimes. But my roommate is the best clarinetist
> > I have ever known. His old college teacher still keeps a picture of him
> > in his office, and nine years later tells his students about the great
> > Matt Hanna, the one that got away (Matt went into computers full time,
> > partially because he flubbed an audition and couldn't handle it). I can
> > sometimes be hypercritical myself, in fact, because we were in charge of
> > recording the concert, we listened to it after we got home last night. I
> > noticed myself dismissing the nice moments and focusing in on the parts
> > that could have been better, noticing intonation issues, etc.=20
> >
> > Why do we do this to ourselves?? Isn't making music supposed to be
> > a joyful thing? Striving for perfection is a good thing, but at what
> > point does it become destructive?
> >
> > I am very worried about my friend. He was still upset hours after the
> > performance, and is still upset today. I feel his technical problems
> > were not very noticeable, other than he was a bit softer and thinner in
> > tone than I am used to hearing him. Anybody else dealing with this
> > problem?
> >
> > Frank Jordan
> > Principal Bassoon
> > Foothills Philharmonic
> > Papageno Quintet - http://www.papagenoquintet.com - feel free to
> > listen to our sound clips!
> >
> > ------------------------------
> >
> > End of doublereed Digest
> > ***********************************
>
>
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