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Doublereed Archive - Posting 000034.txt from 2005/01
From: OhSuzan419@-----.com
Subj: Re: [DR-L] Why do musicians hate themselves??
Date: Sun, 9 Jan 2005 17:36:02 -0500
In a message dated 1/9/2005 3:11:06 PM Eastern Standard Time,
frank@-----.com writes:
<<Why do we do this to ourselves?? Isn't making music supposed to be
a joyful thing? Striving for perfection is a good thing, but at what
point does it become destructive?>>
For many of us, our internal critic sends the message that if we are not
"perfect" or "the best", then we are unworthy, shouldn't be playing, shouldn't
want to play, and have a lot of nerve to even *pretend* to be a musician. In my
own life (and in the lives of several others of whom I am aware) this fear of
falling short has sometimes resulted in being afraid or unable to even play in
front of a teacher or a friend, for fear of being ridiculed or told to hang it
up.
But the secondary gain in this behavior is that by being my own worst critic,
then nobody else can hurt me, and I can keep my hopes and dreams and ego
intact.
The downside, of course, is that if we never risk playing in front of anyone,
our opportunities for musical growth and fulfillment are pretty limited.
The older I get, the less I give a hoot about what anybody else thinks.
That's progress, I think :-)
Susan
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